You Are the Message

Helps you understand how to present yourself better in public, on camera, etc. I really liked his listening tips. I think listening is the lost art of evangelism. You have to learn to listen if you are going to become good at marketing. Take a look at these tips to help you become a better listener from the book: 1. Relax and clear your mind if someone is speaking to you, so that you're receptive to what they're saying. 2 Never assume that you have heard correctly because the first few words have taken you in a certain direction. Most listening mistakes are made by people who only hear the first few words of a sentence, finish the sentence in their own minds, and miss the second half. 3. Learn to speed up your point of contact as a listener. The second you hear a sound coming from another person concentrate quickly on the first few words. That will get you started correctly. 4. Don't tune out a speaker just because you don't like his or her looks, voice, or general demeanor. Stay open to new information. 5. Don't overreact emotionally to the speaker's words or ideas--especially those that may run contrary to your usual thinking. Hear the other person out. 6. Before forming a conclusion, let the speaker complete his or her thought. Then evaluate by distinguishing in your mind specific evidence presented (good) verses generalities (bad). 7. Part of listening is writing things down that are important. You should always have a piece of paper, a pencil, a notebook, or a card in your pocket. Throughout the day many important things will be discussed. Take notes to listen, to remember later, and to document, if necessary.

My college minor some 30 years ago was Speech. I have read some 10 books and many more articles about giving speeches. Roger Ailes book, first published in 1988, is the only one like it I have ever read. His advice is unique, and I believe, right on.Instead of quirky gimmicks, Ailes starts with the factors that make a great speaker -- some of which will surpise you, and encourage you. The book is very readable with lots of anecdotes and great stories to illustrate his points.In my consulting with political candidates I recommend it often. Considering this man's success in television and politics, I don't understand why this book is not more widely read and referenced. I consider it a "secret weapon". After all, this is the man who was a consultant to the man friend and foe alike called the great commuicator, Ronald Reagan. If you read it, you may be the only one you know who has. And then you will wonder, as I have, why more people have not read it.

This title comes from the great Emerson, who also said, "Who you are speaks so loudly, I can't hear what you say." It is not just the words that you verbalize, but the way you carry yourself, as well as the interpretation that your interlocutor makes about what you are expressing. Although this author is a media and political image adviser, his lessons are for everyone. Think about. Haven't you said something before that you wish you could take back? And hasn't someone said something to you, in words that contradicted their actions? And I'll bet that their actions mean more to you, than their words. We all throw out symbols of communication, every minute that we are interacting with another person. And the meaning of that communication really comes down to the response or reaction that we get from those we are talking to. Read this book to enhance the quality of your life. This book enhanced how I read people, because it also taught be to be more free to communicate with my subconscious mind. And the more my self-talk enhanced, the more my social interactions with others became better. Read this book because you deserve more out of your life.

The world is full of speaking coaches, but probably no one has a better track record for success than Roger Ailes. You may remember that Mr. Ailes helped President Reagan prepare for the critical second debate against former Vice President Walter Mondale in 1984 (". . . I promise not to hold his youth and inexperience against him"), and was a senior media advisor to Vice President Bush in the successful 1988 election campaign. His advice is to keep it as simple as possible for the speaker by building on the speaker's own natural conversational patterns, while accentuating the positive in communicating, avoiding the negative, and adding lots of directed energy. Mr. Ailes is a great story teller, and he builds his key points with punchy, personal examples. For example, to establish his key principle about making an impression in the first 7 second you are with someone, he tells about meeting Charles Manson in prison and facing him down with steely eye contact. Manson looked away first. Afterwards, Manson was a willing interview subject. A second story builds the point by describing how a subway stick-up gang extorted money from those showing fearful body language by intimidating them.Even if the book's message was not so important, it would be worthwhile reading the book for the many wonderful stories.Mr. Ailes' basic point is to break down the art of face-to-face and televised communication into the most important elements. He encourages you to emphasize the unspoken dialogue . . . by how you use your body and respond to what others say. Listeners pay much more attention to the body language and to the emotion they feel from you than to the intellectual content of the message. This accentuated on television. Hit the mute button on your remote, and watch people talking to see his point. The whole advice could be boiled down to "keep your conversational style. Increase the energy." In doing this, it helps to be prepared, make others comfortable, be interesting, be committed, be likeable, and be helpful. Whatever the circumstances, he advises controlling the emotional tone of the communication.The book contains many helpful lists including one on the ten things that most hurt communications, such as not establishing adequate rapport in the beginning, or making stiff body movements. The end of the book contains a helpful user's guide that outlines all of the key points. I thought that the best advice for improving was to practice watching yourself on video tape, and evaluating your effectiveness along the lines of what Mr. Ailes suggests. The book also contains many excellent exercises for becoming better at deciding what to do as well as implementing your desires.When I first began making television appearances 20 years ago, I had the benefit of speech coaching. I can certainly agree that the advice here matches well with the experiences that I have had over the 20 years since then, and vastly simplifies what I learned during tha

I use Ailes' book as a textbook for my Entertainment Media Relations classes. This book describes the m.o. plus attitudes to what anybody involved with high visibility should adhere.It emphasizes that you should never change who or what you are, just to improve yourself, and to be involved with what you do in a positive manner.