Would Somebody Please Send Me to My Room!: A Hilarious Look at Family Life

For me the funniest thing I have ever read about becoming a parent was Dave Barry's infamous column on the birth of a child and that special moment when the doctor asks the new father if he would like to view the placenta (Barry suggests that particular experience is something that should be tacked on to criminal penalties). I bring that up that particular comedic reference point because the humor you will find in Bob Schwartz's "Would Somebody Please Send Me to My Room! A Hilarious Look at Family Life" is not like that. This is a kindly, gentler look at the "joys" of parenthood and of adults attempting to co-exist in a household with adolescents, at which point the notion of parenthood no longer seems to be an accurate description of what is going on. In other words, ultimately the humor here comes more from Schwartz's observations than his jokes. These pieces have been collected from various magazines and newspapers. They are devoted to subjects from eternal concerns such as babies crying ("In the Shrill of the Night") to 21st century concerns such as the Harry Potter books ("The Sorcerer's Stone and My Cover Is Blown"). The pieces are arranged thematically with half of an eye towards the chronological experiences of raising children, so we begin with "'That's the Crib Post Up Ahead, Your Next Stop--The "Newborn Zone!"'" (I think I got the quote marks right on that one) and end in the vicinity of "Tag Teaming Family Life," which involves things like music clubs, food warehouses, and changing the diaper on the newest family arrival. So you can see that this one rally is all about the kids, no matter how much parents want to try and move the agenda to other subjects. You want to go through these pieces one or two at a time. "Would Somebody Please Send Me to My Room!" is one of those books that probably works best sitting on your nightstand so that you can read a chapter or two each night as a reminder that you really did plan on having children taking over your entire life. You are not the only one who does not remember how to do Algebra, has to clear a driveway of snow over and over again during winter, and who is seriously being dated by their music (and not in a good way). This book reminds you that you are not alone and that most of the time laughing is the superior option to crying. If you know a beleaguered parent or two (they tend to come in pairs when found in nature), then this could be an appropriate Christmas present. I ended up rounding up on this one because of the illustrations by B.K. Taylor. All too often the illustrations in such books end up being rather inconsequential to the proceedings, but that is not the case her. My favorite (82) shows a smiling father comforting his crying daughter over the horrifically mislaid eye thingamajig of her favorite doll, but I also like the father and son confronting the wall of blue jeans (152), the Halloween candy thief (250), and, of course, Freud at the marshmallow roast (2

I do not have any children of my own, although I spend quite a bit of time with my nieces and nephews ranging in age from four to 16 years of age. There isn't a single chapter in this book that doesn't apply to a situation with at least one of these children and their parents. I also couldn't help thinking (several times) while reading this book that Bob and my own father would get along great. This book was so funny, I couldn't put it down. I finished it in a day because each time I finished a chapter, I had to go on to the next to see if it was just as funny. Each one was. They were all so good, I couldn't pick a favorite if I wanted to! I laughed out loud frequently, and couldn't help but read several passages aloud to anyone who happened to be in the room with me at the time. This is truly one of the funniest and most entertaining books I have ever read. All you have to do is spend any time at all around children, or think back to your own childhood, and you will love this book.

Bob's humours and illuminating account of children and parenting is like a breath of fresh air. All children are unique and Bob's book just helps remind us there is no set formula for parenting. It's a series of fumbling, trial, errors, humor and tears but well worth the journey. You can't help but grin, chuckle and outright laugh as you travel with Bob through a child's and family's trials and tribulations of daily life.

The days I have the luxury of actually sending myself to my room, I like to take Bob's book and simply toss the book upon my my bed. Whatever pages the book opens to, whatever paragraph I start out reading, I get a laugh--every time, no exceptions. Sometimes it's a snicker, sometimes a hearty chuckle, and sometimes, a great, big belly-laugh! Oftentimes while reading this book, I'd wonder about what it must be like to live inside Bob's head, with his incredibly zany way of looking at things! Then I'd think, better stress management for Bob to live in MY head. Reality: Right now the best thing going is reading Bob's work and laughing through it all--page by page, paragraph by paragraph. I absolutely love this book.

Bob's Would Somebody Please Send Me to My Room! hits the nail on the head. Parenting is hard work; but we must look to see the fun times in the mayhem! They are only small once (Thank You God!) and Bob's book can help a harried parent realize he or she is not alone in the chaos of family life. My favorite phrase: We could not get him off the computer without the assistance of a crowbar. Thanks Bob! Fun read!