Why Joy?: Learning to love my special child

It's been a few years since I read this, but the previous reviewer was right in that it was like being hit by a truck. That the family stayed as intact as it did through all this was a testament to the enormous love they did have for each other despite their conflicts. I have to disagree with the reviewer, and the author herself, that Joy was (is?) retarded, and I don't think she was autistic either. Her biggest obstacles appeared to be behavior anomalies not consistent with retardation or autism, and her severe reflux (to the point of vomiting many times a day, solved with an unnamed medication) and other medical problems make me suspect she had some unknown metabolic or chromosomal anomaly that wasn't identified, at least at that time. They probably labeled her "retarded" because they weren't sure what else to call her. If I come across the book again, I'll be sure to re-read it to see if my assessments were correct.

This is an amazingly detailed account of Jane Jennings's experience in raising Joy, given that Joy is in her 30's when she wrote the book. It is at this point at least partly an historical account of what it was like to raise a child with a disability ("borderline retarded") and I found it interesting for that reason. Lack of diagnosis, husband's belief that wife is wrong in saying there are problems, searing shame for having a child with a problem related to the brain. My brother was profoundly retarded and I was aware that although we of course wished he was more able, that it is extremely difficult to deal with someone with more ability. Fast read that left me feeling like a truck hit me.