What Do You Really Want for Your Children?

All parents start with grand expectations for their children. However, many parents are not specifically clear what characters they really want their children to have. Not knowing where to go and how to get there, it results in frustration, friction, conflict, mistrust, ... between the generations. Dr. Dyer's book is an invaluable guide for all serious parents to set the correct goal, make the goal approachable, and make every day of the parent-child relationship a deep enjoyment. This book is not an easy book. As other readers have pointed out, this book is not just about raising kids, but also (perhaps more importantly) about changing the parents themselves. As I read through some of the paragraphs, I often felt my regret for things that I should have not done to my kids (I hope I can be better next time...). Not only did the author set the goals that were founded on sound human development theory (mostly Maslow), but he also gave numerous detailed daily advices that are well organized around these goals. Examples include as simple of an advice as "Do not create monsters in the minds of young children to temporarily quiet them" to the more thoughtful "Try making your adolescent right rather than arguing with them any longer." Another observation worthing everybody's thought is "If you use guilt on children on a regular basis, it will not be long before they start using it on you." I also enjoy the many profound sayings that the author quoted. One is "A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary." The other is "The greatest evil that can befall man is that he should come to think ill of himself."

If you are looking at this review and care about your children or even about yourself, BUY THIS BOOK! I was at a low point in my life, wondering which direction to take and starting to lose sight of who I am. While browsing through parenting books, I found this amazing book and have been highlighting left and right. I discuss it with everyone I can and have found it to be immensely helpful in re-directing my own way of thinking. Postive thoughts surround me, I no longer feel pity on myself, I take action!I am happy to say that although it will make a difference in how I parent my daughter, it already has changed me and how I think. I realize now that I should not allow situations to control me, and this book is wonderfully adept at helping with this. If you have unbridled anger or frustration...this book is for you. Share this book with everyone you know, it will only affect them postively. Although there were some issues which I do not agree with personally, I did understand and respect all of Dr. Dyer's thoughts. It is a powerful and enriching book, which will enhance your life and that of those around you. We need more like this in such trying times.

I think this book is really about what we want for OURSELVES. All parents want the BEST for their kids but they rarely apply it to themselves. This book teaches you how to model the most healthy, sane and life-affirming behavior and attitudes so your children will learn these attitudes. The only way to effectively model this behavior is to actually become this kind of person ourselves. It requires an open mind toward one's own behavior, thoughts and beliefs. Here are the chapter headings:"I want my children to value themselvesI want my children to be risk-takersI want my children to be self-reliantI want my children to be free from stress and anxietyI want my children to have peaceful livesI want my children to celebrate their present momentsI want my children to experience a lifetime of wellnessI want my children to be creativeI want my children to fulfill their higher needs and to feel a sense of purpose"Don't you want to live this way too? I know I do.

My mom is in the childcare business. She has been using this book as a guide to help her rear happier children, with less conflict and more support. She has done an amzing job with some tough to handle kinds...who thanks to her and the help of the book are no longer so tough to handle, and are happier and more cooperative.To this day this is our favourite gifts to new moms we know :)

Until I read this book, I was unaware of how much influence I as a parent make on my child and how much influence my parents were on me. I think it is very helpful to understand why we are the way we are and how we can help our children to become the best they can be. There are a lot of things we just aren't aware of in life that influence our children and this book brings a lot of them to your attention. I am doing a lot of things correct in raising my child, but I also have a lot to learn. This book is terrific! I highly suggest it to parents of children of all ages (even those with adult children)!!