What Babies Say Before They Can Talk: The Nine Signals Infants Use to Express Their Feelings

On the last day of my developmental psychology class, just before I completed my degree, my professor ended the class with one sentence: "I know all of you have wondered at some point during the semester what you will some day do as parents. My advice is simple. Read What Babies Say Before They Can Talk." I frantically jotted this down in my planner and went on with life. A while later when we were expecting our son, I gladly ordered this book and was blown away at how far above and beyond it exceeded my expectations. I must admit after completing the book I am very jealous. I worked extremely hard on my school's pre-medical psychology degree track to obtain pieces of the knowledge presented in this book. While I had to also learn names, theory and cite endless laboratory proof just to come away with the "good stuff", like how to be a thoughtful and effective parent, it seems a teensy bit unfair that this one small book could give parents the same arsenal of knowledge I am coming into parenthood with after years of extensive study. Nevertheless, I whole-heartedly recommend it to anyone who is wanting to break the bonds of over-protective, bossy, traditional parenthood roles and allow their children to truly grow with wise and empowering guidance. If I had to pick only one parenting book to read, this would be it. I think you'll find your fears of turining into your parents (or having out-of-control toddlers) melt away with each page that you turn. (For anyone, psychology-degreed or not, who is interested in reading further on the subject of non-judgemental parenting, may I also recommend "Redirecting Children's Behavior" by Kathryn J. Kvols. This gives you the skills to parent beyond the baby years into the toddler and teenage years with wisdom that could not be learned by yourself in a thousand lifetimes of raising children.)

The saying "a picture is worth a thousand words," is very true...especially when it comes to facial expressions. How many times have you looked at a baby's face and wondered what they were thinking? How frustrating it must be for them to want to verbally communicate with others, but being too young to know how. What if you could "read" a baby's cues, and know exactly what they were feeling? In the book, "What Babies Say Before They Can Talk: The Nine Signals Infants Use to Express Their Feelings," Paul C. Holinger, M.D., M.P.H., discusses nine simple "signals" that babies use to express their feelings: These signals are: interest, enjoyment, surprise, distress, anger, fear, shame, disgust, and dissmell. The author explains how children are born knowing how to communicate their feelings with these symbols, and that adults need to take the time to understand and learn how their child communicates using these symbols. This book also includes much information about parenting, helping your children develop high self-esteem, and explains the nine signals in detail. MyParenTime.com highly recommends this book -- learning how a baby communicates creates better understanding, better interaction, and a better relationship between parent and child. In addition, responding to a child's needs early on, makes happier and healthier parents and children.

I agree with the another reviewer that the title is misleading. This book is quite profound and immediately impacted how I viewed my children's behavior. I started reading it when my daughter was a newborn and wished I had it earlier. My only complaint, and I am having a hard time wording this...its a little...guilt inducing? It raises the bar of your parenting, and my reaction was to feel like I won't be able to measure up. Stories of insensative parenting weren't treated with a light touch or sense of 'we've all been there.' My parenting skills are a work in progress and my belief is that it will probably be a LIFE LONG process. But I've always gotten that sense from therapists. They talk about other people's faults and stories, not their own. But that doesn't affect my rating, the book is really excellent.

One of the best baby books out there from a psychological perspective. If I could only buy one baby book, this book would be it! Dr. Holinger is a psychoanalyst and he applies theory in a way that is very accessible. As a therapist I am surprised to see how few baby books are written by psychologists and psychoanalysts. I was happy to find this book and recommend it highly. It helps parents understand what being attuned truly means and it makes parenting more enjoyable. The first two years are so important and this book helps make them easier. It can also be applied to parenting in general because it promotes being responsive, empathic, and validating.

This is a wonderful resource. My oldest son, Max, is nearly three, and I wish I'd read this book earlier! I have been at wit's end lately with Max, and frustrated to the point where I've lost all my confidence as a parent. I felt like I spent all day saying "no", or crushing his spirit by yelling. There were more bad days than good days. As I began reading Dr. Holinger's book, I was immediately able to start substituting better solutions for us. The problem is usually not with Max, it was with my reactions to Max's behavior. Every day is better when it ends with less yelling. Thank you Dr. Holinger!