Uncle Sam's Brides: The World of Military Wives

My mother was an enlisted wife and lived in military housing until 2002. I grew up in the navy. This is exactly how it was and is. Maybe it varies by region or base, but there are still major problems for enlisted wives. Poverty, isolation, and depression ARE common. Although there are women who are able to over come these issues, it is not common. Military families deserve higher pay, better benefits (tricare is pathetic) better housing (without asbestos) and access to childcare help/resources. None of this is available which lead to very sad living conditions for MOST enlisted wives. And yes there is extreme classism in the military, anybody who doesn't see it is not on the receiving end of it.

This book is a real eye-opener. The stats and studies cited by the authors are mainly from the 1970s-'80s, and I sincerely hope conditions for US military dependents have improved. (With the latest round of budgets cuts and BRAC, I shudder to think of how on-base facilities will be affected, including daycare and family medical services.) And I also hope that attitudes toward working spouses have changed -- surely it's in the military's best interest to recognize that a dependent wife with a college degree and established profession may contribute substantially to her family's budget, thereby lessening the need for extra support from the government (e.g., food stamps). Such a lady is more deserving of the title, "independent"! In the first chapter, the authors give a brief overview of living conditions at frontier army posts during the 19th century. Interested readers can learn more from such books as, "Glittering Misery: Dependents of the Indian-Fighting Army" by Patricia Y. Stallard (Univ. of OK Press, 1991/2), and, "Vanished Arizona" by Martha Summerhayes, who braved the Arizona Territory with her soldier husband in the 1870s [Bison Books (reprint), 1979].

Although this book was written in 1990 and many changes have taken place since then, and changes continue to be made, the accuracy is unbelievable. Personally, I believe the military person should read this to see what it feels like to be a military spouse. Only military spouses know the actual hardships and I for one am glad I read this book. It gave me persmission to finally say that yes, being a military spouse is hard without sounding like a complaint. Being a military spouse is easier than it was 20 years ago and let's hope if another book is written in 20 years, it will be much better still. This book gives a voice to military wives that has been quiet for so long . My only regret is that I didn't read the book in 1990!!

Anyone with an interest in the sociological perspectives of being a military spouse as well as anyone living in a democratic society will find this book eye-opening, thought-provoking, and potentially disturbing. Published a decade ago and now out of print, one would like to think it is because the themes are outdated-- but while they may be under increasing opposition from the "new spouses" and other much-needed forces of change, military spouses past and present will recognize and be able to relate to the accounts outlined within. Definitely not something I'd give to a prospective military spouse unless I was seeking to discourage him/her from marrying into the military. Nonetheless, this book is thought-provoking and really leaves one questioning what our armed forces stand for... the irony seems to be that the very things we cherish as Americans are denied to military spouses, including basic civil rights, fundamental independence, and freedom from coercion and forced servitude. Viewed collectively, the authors seem to paint an extremist view-- but from spouse abuse, to denial of employment, to isolation from family and friends, to discrimination against immigrant wives, to unspoken pressure to have children, and to other unique facets of military family life, the individual accounts are often right on the money. This book takes a factual approach, greater in scope but in some ways similar to the provocative fictional piece by Charlie Hudson (Orchids in the Snow).