Try to Remember

TRY TO REMEMBER is both a gripping psychological thriller and an incredibly sensitive portrait of a family. As the parent of grown daughters, I felt for and with all the characters, and especially admired Kotker's imaginative portrayal of the father. This is a must-read for anyone who has ever been in therapy, anyone who has ever questioned the dynamics of recovered memory, and anyone looking to better understand his/her own adult children or parents. Hardly movie-of-the-week material, TRY TO REMEMBER struck me as a fine and enduring time capsule of late-20th century America.

Brilliantly portrayed power of the "shrink" and the devastation that can occur when misuse by the manipulation of a patient's mind occurs at the hands of a psychiatric counsellor. Beautifully written with wonderful characterization and descriptions of people,inner thoughts, places, and events, resulting in a tumultuous turmoil of family destruction, but leaving hope on a thread of possibility.

Zane Kotker's novel takes a long, hard look at the counseling profession and the potential damage--along with the good--that therapists with an agenda are capable of when they get their hands and minds on malleable, vulnerable patients. Reading this tale made me realize how easily this kind of family tragedy can occur, given the current climate of sexual guilt, confusion and uncertainty in which so many of us operate. In one sense, the story seems to have been lifted right off the front page of yesterday's daily newspaper; but what makes reading the book worthwhile are the human faces we meet behind the headlines. And her view of the fragility of family life. Let me add, I also enjoyed the snapshots of Nineties urban life among the twenty-somethings. As in her earlier books, Kotker shows humor, insight and compassion.

Kirkus is unfair. This book is not strident, and it is not a"movie-of-the-week" subject, but a moving novel of family life today. The mother and father are memorably portrayed. They could be one's parents, or oneself. The psychiatric profession doesn't look very good by the end of the book--but the picture is quite realistic. False memories and false accusations of sexual abuse are among the most tragic and fascinating phenomena of recent times, an undertow that more than one family has drowned in. This novel shows how such things can happen, and why, and how one young woman managed to free herself.

This is a terrific book about a very touchy subject. Before you let the Kirkus review turn you off, consider what Publisher's Weekly had to say, "Timely and trechant, Kotker's examination of fmaily dynamics in an era of confrontational blame is a gripping read." And the Library Journal, which gave the book a star, said, "Kotker has produced a sensitive, finely crafted portrayal of two generations -- empty-nest parents and their grown children foundering in their new independence -- and of a tragedy that alters their lives irrevocably."