Time-In

Realizing that time out wasn't working for my little one, I turned to this book and found it worked most of the time...NOT always. Of course, you cannot do any form of discipline every time but this gave me more positive options for disciplining my kiddos without yelling or punishing every time. I was impressed with the simplicity of the book, the length (who has a lot of time to read when chasing kiddos around:) and the content.

I love this book, which advocates teaching children the skills to think about what they are doing or have done (through Ask and Attend), and to change their behavior and make amends (through Act and Amend). This approach works beautifully when you have plenty of time to use the teachable momment. I've used it for playground issues and sibling issues, among other things. However, sometimes a faster strategy is needed. For example, imagine children getting a bit rowdy in the library, chasing each other through the stacks. You need a quick, immediate way to bring the festivities to a halt. For those scenarios, I recommend the "1-2-3 Magic" book. Once your kids are trained in the 1-2-3 approach, you can just stand there and count "1, 2..." and before you get to three all of your children will be standing in front of you. (I speak from experience here - the 1-2-3 approach is very fast and gets immediate compliance.) Anyway, in a situation like the library above, after your children are standing quietly in front of you, you can switch to the "Time-In" approach, asking them how they think other people in the library feel, etc... Definitely worth a read.

This book was such a quick and easy read. I think it's a good part of a mother's overall loving guidance toolbox. I use the "ask, act, amend, attend" techniques it recommends with my child. I also draw on other techniques to help me with positive discipline, so, while this doesn't provide the whole picture, it's a great piece.

I think this book outlines what the parents of the United States need to do to discipline their children. This book is short and has short chapters for the busy parent or caregiver. The process of discipline suggested can be adapted to any situation or set of values. It does, however, assume that the reader is willing to put time and effort into becoming a good caregiver of children. The philosophy of this book is in connecting children with their caregivers through stopping unwanted behavior, making a connection by teaching the child what you want them to learn, and therfore how to solve their own problems and take responsibility for the outcomes of their actions and attitudes.