Julian: I've been in love with my best friend since forever. Okay, fine. Like, kindergarten. It started out platonic, obviously, but then became... nope. Still platonic. The problem is that Parker Ellis has been straight since forever. And that makes it difficult to convince him the two of us are meant to be together. And now there's no point. All is lost. He's gone and gotten engaged to his high-school sweetheart...