The Rules(tm) II: More Rules to Live and Love by

Plenty of women spout common and cliched criticisms of these books. Let's take a popular one: Men say that they like it when girls ask them out, call them, they're shy, etc etc. Well I'm sure that if you polled 100 men, a significant number of them would say that they like it when girls sleep with them on the first date. It probably won't take a book to tell you that men aren't going to marry these girls. Think this is an extreme analogy? Fine, but think about what you're saying before you claim that men like this and men say this. Also, men wouldn't be very popular if they said that they liked to pursue women, they like to pay, they want to be the one to make the first move. They probably would get burned at the feminist stake. And as far as being yourself and doing what you feel, would you "be yourself" on a job interview? And you might feel like slouching, but you know it's not good for you, even though it doesn't "feel natural" to sit up straight. And when you want to lose weight, you don't do what you feel, you get up off of the couch to jog and get small fries instead of supersized. I think that the real reason that there is such an outcry against this type of advice is because it is the hardest. It is SO hard not to call, and not to tell him how you feel, and not to rationalize his unromantic behaviors. But deal with your own issues instead of blindly raging against something that you clearly don't understand. Because if you did understand the Rules, truly understand them, you would be doing them.

The 1st book was way better, but this book gives you that extra knowledge that won't fit into that tiny 1st book. Still an excellent book. I can't thank these authors enough!Here is part of an e-mail my friend wrote to me after borrowning my "Rules" books:"I can NOT begin to tell you the difference I have noticed in the way men treat me already! I don't walk around "scouting" for men like I used to. I get where I'm going and I have things to do and people to see and you would not believe the guys who say hi. I feel better too. It really makes a difference!"Now if that doesn't make you want to buy the book....

As someone who considers herself a highly intelligent, well-educated individual, I originally turned up my nose at these "manipulative" Rules, claiming, after having read the first book, that they would only work on a certain, superficial type of man. But let me tell you what I've discovered - acting as if you like yourself and your life and that you are just as happy without a man as with one is the only way to ever really find happiness *with* one! Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider have been slammed for writing these books, when in actuality the message they are trying to get across is: "stop being so pathetic, stop sitting around daydreaming about how some guy will make your life perfect, because when you think that way, you're *bound* to end up looking needy and desperate!" I think the reason these books offended so many "feminists" is because even feminists act this way! Even the most intelligent, intellectual, well-educated women in the world doodle their first name with the dream guy's last name, daydream about their wedding, etc...yet hate it about themselves. The bottom line is, don't knock "The Rules" books just because they appear calculating and manipulative. Granted, there are brainless bimbos out there who follow the book to the letter without ever getting the greater message, whose only goal is getting a rich husband. But these books are also great "how-to" guides for those of us who *know* we have to stop being doormats and that we have a tendency to rationalize it by saying we're just "being open and honest". I also recommend "Men Like Women Who Like Themselves".

These two authors are on the ball! Both of their books sit on my shelve next to my Holy Bible. Initial impressions: No, you may not find their books a literary work. Their rules sound very selfish and may make you uncomfortable. There are no statistics or control groups mentioned.Conclusion: Who cares? This book works just like the first Rules book. Every time I get weak-minded and listen to how a man (any and all men) say how wonderful he is or how beautiful I am, etc, I pull out both of Ellen's books. Then I allow the more unsuitable men to return back to the common property cesspool from whence they came. The more decent ones are still around. At least we are friends. One is even more. My advice: ignore all the authors' angry critics, (including the women who are the mothers, mistresses, and man-worshippers who have created and sustained the "men" the authors' Rules continue to screen out). I strongly recommend Ellen & Sherrie's books. These women are both very intelligent and courageous!

I don't think The Rules should be followed like a Bible, but there are some very valid points-- about 75% in my estimation-- in there. The media, as usual, likes to quote out of context to devalue the entire book. For example, the media hypes the rule that a woman should not accept a date for Saturday after Wednesday. True, the book cites the theory that the woman who agrees to a last-minute date will enable a man to use her as a last resort for that weekend when the women he truly likes turn him down, and he is less likely to respect her because of it. However, the book also makes the valid point that a woman should be busy and fulfilled with hobbies outside of dating. Not only will this make her less desperate for a man, but she'll be more interesting to date because of her activities. Therefore, a woman should be active enough that she has at least a vague idea of other things to do for the weekend if the telephone does not ring by Thursday, so she'll be telling the truthwhen she tells a guy who asks her on Saturday afternoon for a Saturday night date. Appropos to this, in college I was puzzled when some men in the dorms labled various women "Karen" even when their names were otherwise. Women got this title by being sure-thing dates when the women the men really wanted to date were busy, and "Karens" rarely got to meet a guy's parents. One day I learned why these females were called Karen. It rhymes with Guarantee. Read The Rules II.