The Ridiculous Race: 26,000 Miles, 2 Guides, 1 Globe, No Airplanes

Book Overview In 2007, two friends -- Steve Hely and Vali Chandrasekaran -- embarked on a race around the world without using airplanes. Steve traveled West, and Vali traveled East. The first guy who circled the planet and make it back to Los Angeles would be declared the winner. The prize? A bottle of the finest Scotch they could find. Not being just ordinary guys (both are writers for television comedy shows), they were able to get a book advance to bankroll their trip. The result was this book, which chronicles each man's journey. Steve -- the more serious of the two and the one committed to racing by following the rules -- starts his trip on board the container ship Hanjin Athens. As such, he is able to definitively answer the question: Is fourteen days on the Pacific a grand, romantic adventure or crushingly boring? To quote Steve: The short answer is "crushingly boring." By the time we left port, it was clear that the greatest danger facing me wasn't pirates or storms. Or sharks. Or giant squid, Or flesh-eating jellyfish. Or being raped and stabbed by sailors. Or string rays. It was keeping my idle mind from destroying itself. After this journey, Steve takes a road trip through China (including a gut-wrenching but hilarious night at the Peking Opera) and ends up on a train that takes him through Mongolia (with a brief stop at Ulaanbaatar , which he affectionately dubs "A City for People Who Hate Cities.") Along the away, he becomes obsessed with drinking fermented mare's milk. (Wonder what fermented mare's milk tastes like? Here is Steve's description: "Get some half-and-half and a can of warm Sprite. Mix the two in a glass. Let sit for a few days on top of your radiator.") He then boards the Trans-Siberian Railroad and meets Vali at the "halfway" point in Moscow. Meanwhile, Vali starts his trip driving to Mexico with a attractive woman he has hired to help him navigate and translate the country. (Did I mention they have a side bet on who can do the most awesome things during the trip -- The Awesomeness Contest? With "awesome" being defined as "meeting and romancing the most beautiful girls possible.") Vali's goal is to visit the world's premier designer of jet-packs, which Vali intends to purchase and use to fly across the oceans. However, jet-packs cost $250,000 and can hold only 30 seconds worth of fuel, so he is forced to scuttle this plan. After driving north back to the United States, Vali breaks the no airplane rule and flies to Brazil, where he joins a Brazilian graffiti gang. (In Rio, he begins having his trip-long problems with travel visas and document.) From there he jets to Europe and visits London, Paris ("Beneath my awestruck face my blood boiled. I was furious Paris was not overrated."), Berlin and Warsaw -- before meeting Steve in Moscow. In Moscow, the two meet for a "truce day," in which hijinks, practical jokes and obscene amounts of drinking set the tone. They then depart and go their separate ways.

This book is hysterically funny. I found people gawking at me, quite often, when I read this book in public places. I couldn't help myself from laughing aloud. In fact, I found out about this book when my best friend was in the hospital. When I arrived, having rushed to meet her in emergency labor and delivery, she seemed very disappointed that someone had shown up because she had to put her book down and speak to me. She was reading, The Ridiculous Race. I have bought a couple copies of this book so that I can give them as gifts. It's amazing how 2 idiots can brighten your day. Things to look for: The Trans-Siberian Railroad, horseback riding, picking up women in Paris, Brazilian graffitti gangs, and fermented mare's milk. You might not know it yet but, you love this book.

This book is not a classic travel memoir, but it is quite funny. I particularly enjoyed the vastly different perspectives of the authors. In order to have a good time reading this book, I believe it's important to recognize that it's really a contest about two things. One is the linear concept of going around the world, and the other is a little more difficult to define: the awesomeness quotient. The authors are immature at times and not the paragons of good taste. But they are comedy writers. And it's rare to find a book that truly makes you laugh so hard that others are looking at you as if to say, "What are you reading?" It also makes you truly want to travel, and that is the most important thing about a travel book in my opinion.

I haven't laughed while reading a book as much as I did reading this one in a while. It is exactly what you would expect from a couple of television comedy writers (My Name is Earl and Family Guy!) who decide to race around the world without using airplanes. If you're not a fan of those shows/that type of humor, then you may want to stay away. While their comedic talents really shine through in the book, the book is also fascinating from a travel and cultural perspective. For example, this is personally the most I've ever read about Mongolia. Of course, based on the descriptions in the book, it may also be the most I WILL EVER read about Mongolia, but it made for several very funny stories. The book is a light, easy read, with no real chapters, but instead with short sections, alternating between the two authors. Easy to get through, very funny, very entertaining and very recommended for anyone who likes a little bit of humor thrown in with their travelogues.

My review title says it all, folks. Hely and Chandrasekaran are simply amazing. (Full disclosure: I wrote this book.)