The Real Frank Zappa Book

By way of dissing Zappa's famous appearance before Congress to argue against warning labels on records, conservative columnist Don Feder derisively refers to Frank Zappa as a "rock creature" and makes fun of him for naming his daughter Moon Unit. (You'll find these remarks in _A Jewish Conservative Looks at Pagan America_. Feder is usually better than this.) But the fact is that Zappa was a genuine homegrown American original, a musical genius, and a thoroughly subversive Enemy Of The State. And whatever one thinks of their names, the rest of us should have children like Zappa's. (They're all grown up now, of course, but Moon was a highly poised young lady even at the age of thirteen. I don't remember seeing any of Feder's kids on talk shows when _they_ were teenagers.) Love or hate his music; agree or disagree that his sometimes-acerbic social commentary often went over the line into sheer pornography. If you want to meet the man himself, this book is the only one you need to read. It's all in his own words, as told to Peter Occhiogrosso. The style will be recognizable to anyone who has ever read the liner notes on a Zappa album. And the content is part autobiography, part correction of underground-rock-grapevine misconceptions, part almost-libertarian political activism, part musing on the nature of musical composition. A handful of highlights, chosen from among many: He proposes that music could be digitally downloaded, an idea whose time apparently hadn't come when Zappa first thought of it. The chapter on his "pornography trial" in the UK is hilarious, not least because it includes selections from the actual transcripts. And if you want to know _why_ his kids turned out so well-spoken and mature at such early ages, check out his advice on childrearing. By the way, Zappa did not do drugs, no matter how many well-meaning imbeciles tell you otherwise. On the contrary, he was one of a handful of anti-drug crusaders in the music industry, and one of an even smaller handful who wasn't a recovering addict himself. Reality is better than drugs anyway, and Zappa knew it. His untimely death from prostate cancer left a gaping hole; he was irreplaceable. But thank goodness for this book.

This is not casual reading, summer reading, something you just pick up. It's an inside account for the fact- and tidbit-hungry FZ fan-atic, for those FZ-crazed psychos who have to know more than you do about one of rock's ultimate musical geniuses. This book is written for the Zappa fan by FZ himself, and as such it is an essential addition to an FZ fan's collection. If you've listened to your FZ albums to the point where you know the songs' lyrics, have heard/read some of the rumors and legends, and wish to expand "your mythology" and "conceptual continuity," you're ready.FZ's music leads the way, as it should, and you'll either love it or hate it pretty quickly. Reading up on FZ before you start listening to his recordings isn't going to help you, and more likely would serve to confuse. This being said, this book is best for the FZ listener who has made the critical personal decision to become an FZ fan, and who wants to educate himself/herself a little bit more about the man who makes the noises come out of the speaker.And this book is the best place to start. As an (assisted) autobiography, this is the real deal, the observations, memories, and facts directly from the source. FZ says himself in the introduction, "...I do not think of my life as amazing in any sense--however, the opportunity to say stuff in print about tangential subjects is appealing." The countless FZ web pages and fanzines contain all of the information contained in this book and then some, but this is the best place to start your FZ education. FZ's dedication of the book to "Gail, the kids, Stephen Hawking and Ko-Ko" (the 'talking' gorilla) provide the very first indication that the reader is in for a better glimpse of FZ than you can get from listening to the sonic eccentricity of "Billy The Mountain" or "Weasels Ripped My Flesh."The format is essentially chronological, but wide open, free flowing, with quick jumps to new subjects as diverse as "Jazz: The Music of Unemployment" and "How To Raise Unbelievable Children." There are lists, poetry, instructions, lyrics, interview snippets, letters, transcripts of congressional testimony, tables, photos, and wonderful illustrations. The illustrations are fine, detailed and punctuating the text well, done by the mysterious hieroglyph-signature artist whose name escapes me. What is surprising is that FZ couldn't get longtime FZ album cover artist Cal Schenkel to contribute his talents to the book.The book is a great investment, a fine addition to an eclectic library, and a wonderful repeat read.

We get some of everything with this one. It gives us a feel for his personality and speaking style. Italics, underlining, and boldface are used liberally; I could hear his voice as I read.It gives us a nice collection of anecdotes from various stages of Zappa's career, from his high school years up through the orchestral work with the LSO - even a couple of tales from the 1988 'Best Band You Never Heard'. If you like these, you will wish there were more, though.It gives us what has to be the best general description of a composer's work ever ('wiggling air molecules, changing over time'). That chapter alone is worth the cost of the book, if you are at all interested in music or art. We also get the political Zappa, some lyrics, the Zappa home life, and even a bit of What Frank Eats (whatever the kids don't, apparently).The only thing we don't get (and this is why I wish he'd lived another 30 years) is some detailed analysis of his compositions. We get a couple of places where he is discussing musical theory and practice from a technical perspective (chord progressions that cannot occur in doowop, or why jazz drummers are not normally appropriate in a Zappa band), there is no music printed in the book to help the interested reader follow along. Certainly I can't fault the book for this, but, man, it would have been nice if he'd written one like that.If you are a student of music, a budding composer, artist, or just think Frank freaks folks out, this is for you.

This book has it all! It's a bio, it contains dirty rock tour stories, it contains Zappa's own views on a variety of topics, including, but not limited to, family values, guitar playing, drugs, American society, religion, politics and whatnot. For the reader familiar with Zappa's lyrics, you'll feel right at home. It's written in the same manner as his songs, in a personal style so his own that you hear his voice saying the words as you read them. I love it. I've read it five times already and will read it many more. Invaluable.

The Real Frank Zappa Book is great. It captures the humor found in his music, explains some of the concepts that keep popping up, provides a neat look at rock history, and has some scathing commentary about the reality behind the PMRC and rock censorship. Even if you don't listen to his music, read Zappa's book!