The Mother Knot

when i was a new mother 31 years ago, it seemed like everyone i knew waltzed into motherhood loving every single thing about it. there was no talk of being anything but dazzled by all aspects of being a mother. post partum depression deserved a few pages at the end of every mothering book i read, and there was a pathology to it that i did not want to admit to. deep inside, i was going crazy staying home, dealing with a newborn, struggling with discontent.... while i had a wonderful, healthy, beautiful son. "the mother knot" became my bible; someone else out there understood the painful yet funny predicament i was in. even if you are adoring being a mommy, you will find something deeply moving in this wonderful little book, written by a kindred spirit of all mothers.

Mother Knot, an autobiography by Jane Lazzarre shows a different but very real reaction and perspective of a mother who is raising a child. Uncontrollable crying, bathing, feeding, and just being with your child is a handful, but some mothers are afraid to tell people the struggles, anger, frustration, and pain they go through when raising their child because they fear that people will see them as an inadequate or even bad mother. Thus there are not many stories by parents on how much they struggled when raising their children. In this book, the pain, confusion, and struggle Lazzarre goes through as a mother is very vivid and moving. She describes her frustrations with her child, her husband, and herself and through out the book we see how she learns to deal. Mother Knot is definitely and eye opener on how much mothers and fathers struggle and give up so much for their children.

I had heard The Mother Knot mentioned and recommended highly in a few other books I've read, including one I read recently that prompted me to order it and read it for myself. It's a short book, but it's packed with eye-opening details that distill and debunk the mother myth. Although written in the mid-1970s, this book feels as fresh as if it were written today, and its insights into the reality of life for new mothers was refreshing and enlightning. I recommend it very highly for every woman, mother or otherwise, and for every man. If it doesn't enlighten you as to your own experience or possible experience, it will awaken you to the reality of mothers everywhere--and to your mother's reality.