The Last Gift of Time: Life Beyond Sixty

Heilbrun is a bit older than me, I'll be 60 next year, and I thank her for writing THE LAST GIFT OF TIME-LIFE BEYOND SIXTY. I like the book so much, I am sending a copy to my sister who is also approaching the big 6-0. Over and over again Heilbrun has written just the book I needed to read at just the time I needed to read it--LIFE is "right on time." (Other books I've enjoyed include TOWARD A RECOGNITION OF ANDROGENY, REINVENTING WOMANHOOD, AND WRITING A WOMAN'S LIFE). Heilbrun is one of my "unmet" friends (described in THE LAST GIFT OF TIME). Reading the younger reviewer who obviously didn't "get" Heilbrun causes me to suspect 1)she does not work with men; and/or 2) she is not old enough to appreciate what her older female "sisters" have accomplished. Women struggling with the daily Chinese water-torture of patronizing and discounting males in the workplace (never subtle), and/or older women who lived through the 50s and 60s who were not allowed to attend "men's" schools or hold "men's" jobs will appreciate Heilbrun. (As will enlightened men.) Although the women's movement has accomplished much, much remains to be done. As Heilbrun points out, until the preference for male babies ends and the existence of "pompous, self-satisfied, established males" is terminated, the movement is not over. Heilbrun's chapters are conversational, newsy, and cheerful. They contain the sort of friendly advice you seek from an old friend. Yes, get a computer and learn how to use email. My aunts in their 80s have learned how to log on and write mail to each other and their children and nieces and nephews. Like Heilbrun's family, we are a reconnected family again. If you have an older relative, help them become computer literate. Heilbrun says enjoy slacks!!! I laughed out loud when I looked in my old 1959 high school year book and recalled that we girls were "allowed" to wear pants to school one day a year, the day we worked on the homecoming floats (I'm not given to looking backwards, the younger gals in the office wanted me to bring my yearbook to work so I checked it out beforehand to make sure it contained no embarrasing moments). I also had the unpleasant experience in 1973 of being "thrown out" of the commisary at the local army post because I had had dared to enter the store wearing pants. I had a full cart of groceries and was in the check-out lane. I had to go home with my three children under age 10 in tow, change clothes and drive back to the store and start all over again. You better believe Heilbrun's chapter "On not wearing dresses" stuck a cord with me. In "The dog who came to stay" Heilbrun shares her experiences with Bianca the Black Shepherd. She says a dog can get you out for that walk you need every day and provide you with all the unconditional love you can stand. Her section on men is equally informative. She says, if you get a cat you should expect he will scratch the furniture, and you make up your mind you will tolerate his "catty" behavior

I'm a 72-year-old Grandmother, and I thought it was great. I'm a Master's candidate in Writing with an undergrad minor in Women's Studies, and this book reflects perfectly attitudes that were prevalent in the 1950s and 1960s. Young women who were born in the 1970s wouldn't understand Heilbrun's focus on androgyny or the frustration that was prevalent in smart, educated women who needed more than children and housework. But we who were born in the 1920s and 1930s understand it perfectly. Kudos to Heilbrun.

She paints it as a freeing experience, and I felt as if I were in Carolyn's presence as she sat cozy in an arm chair, fire blazing, glass of wine in hand, having an honest conversation with me, her friend. The unabashed truthfulness, the scathing remarks about her pompous male confrees at Columbia, the tender realization of her longing for her husband's company - the entire book - a wry but warm delight. I recommend it to anyone fifty or over. The young would never understand.

Very validating for women who have worked in the American academy. Parts of this are a scathing but accurate summary of what life is like as a professor---other parts confirm that her own gift to women is far larger than mostbecause it is the gift of wisdom and of shared experience. (If it can happen at Columbia to a woman who has truly made a contribution and achieved several high honors, then it is probably happening to women everywhere.) This book inspires one to live the rest of one's life with meaning and purpose. It literally gives permission to people who have high-achieved and been severely undervalued. I have given it to a number of friends. They've all been as pleased and as astonished as I was.

I share the view that age adds a beautiful dimension if one so chooses. More freedom than can be imagined in the earlier years of responsibilty to others. The author gives encouragement and hope to those of us in search of meaning as we approach the end of life. Though our circumstances differ, the possiblities for each are unlimited. Cheers to this beautiful woman who expresses so well what older women need to hear.