The Illusion of Love: Why the Battered Woman Returns to Her Abuser

If you have been abused or you work with people who are being abused (that accounts for 85% of the US) read this book. It's not obvious, even to victims, why they can't just walk away. Since typically the abuser is male and victim is a female I was impressed that this compassionate book on the subject was written by a male. A classic in the subject of abuse.

The author provides a foundational understanding of the psychodynamics and cyclic nature of abusive relationships. Celani explains how adult relations are unconscious repetitions of early childhood 'object relations'. He also compares his theories to those of other researchers and addresses practical methods for helping the victims. He is apparently passionate about the subject, making the book lively and approachable for lay persons as well as for psychotherapists.