Fascinating Girl: Vintage Edition

I first read this book while I was dating my husband. We were very well-matched for each other, but we were having a lot of trouble for reasons we couldn't quite put our finger on. It was like we kept pushing against each other. I'd get frustrated and sullen, and he would then get distant; which prompted me to get more frustrated, etc., etc. His mother, seeing our difficulty, slipped this book into my car one day. What an eye-opener! I had grown up with very little guidance on interactions between men and women. My parents gave me wise advice about saving myself until marriage and what sort of man to look for, but they didn't speak much on what kind of girl I should be to attract such a man. Thus, I had drawn most of my impressions from the mess that comes through pop culture and mass media. There were tons of conflicting messages about what it takes to be attractive: the Charlie's Angels, coy but dangerous; the fierce career woman that commands respect; the sweet, dreamy, and impulsive drifter; the sporty and tough types that were popular at school; and the sexy sort that flaunt their bodies. I wasn't sure which one to go for (they all seemed to work somehow), so I tried to do it all within the constraints of my own personality. You can imagine the confusion that resulted. The Fascinating Girl showed me that the natural impulses I had to be sweet and girly were not wrong, as I had believed them to be. It addressed the types of women above and explained how they came across to men. Ultimately, I realized that each of these character traits -- sweet, sexy, dreamy, tough -- are attractive to men in some way. Used incorrectly, however, they would not attract a wholesome man or keep him hooked for the long run. It also taught me to understand men, which is sadly not something the world promotes anymore. (It prefers to bully men into being what it thinks they ought to be; much damage is done in the process.) It set a lot straight for me amidst the confusion. The deepest message of The Fascinating Girl that I took away was that you can't trick your way into a good relationship. Being fascinating comes first and foremost from a virtuous character, and second from expressing your character in charming ways. (This isn't being sneaky: You wouldn't wear pajamas to a job interview and expect to get hired; nor would you give a purple sweater to a friend who hates purple. So why would a woman approach finding a husband with all the wrong attitudes and mannerisms? Being in denial won't help anything.) Perhaps my only quibble (and a small one) with Andelin's approach is that, taken to a T, it creates a somewhat smoke-and-mirrors relationship. I would add honesty as the final and key ingredient. The thing to remember is that honesty does not preclude being considerate of the other person's nature. The brand of brutal and nasty "honesty" I see promoted today just isn't going to do anyone any good, yourself least of all. Remember, marriage doesn't work as a 50

I read Fascinating Girl (or, it may have been Fascinating Womanhood, I don't remember, but the principles are the same) 15 years ago when I was a teenager. This book teaches that men/boys aren't attracted so much to what a girl looks like as who they are inside. I studied this book religiously and became the Fascinating Girl described in the book. I credit it with changing my life and making all my future relationships, and especially my marriage, blissfully happy. Some people say that you should "be who you are" and "don't change yourself" to "get" a guy. But, shouldn't we all try to improve who we are... become sweeter and kinder anyway? What's wrong with working on ourselves to bring out the best? And the best, as Helen writes about, just so happens to be an ideal of a woman/girl that men love to fall in love with. And that's exactly what happens when you really follow this book. The Fascinating Girl isn't about tricks or manipulative things to try on men (although there are some great ideas for that!), it's about becoming the best person a female can be and in the process, watch men fall at your feet. After many such men, because of everything this book taught, I was in a position to choose the best and I married the man of my dreams. Five years and two children later he's still blissfully in love with me (and I with him) and he still puts me on the pedestal discussed in the book. Thank you, Helen!

I was in high school the first time I picked up this book. I thumbed through it and was completely offended at its suggestions for attracting men. I labeled it "demeaning". I was then, and remain very conservative and traditional but I have a defiant sexy streak in me that reacted violently to the idea of regressing back into girlhood in order to secure the man of my choice. I had sex appeal and I wanted people to see how powerful I was because of it, not hide it under ribbons and bows. Besides, I reasoned, a REAL man will prefer a REAL woman (a.k.a: a sexy, confidant woman). Well, I never actually dated while in high school and couldn't understand why I attracted men who were 7 - 15 years older than me instead of the ones around my own age. My first boyfriend was 13 years older than I was, and my second boyfriend was 12 years older. The second actually admitted that he loved the fact that I was so much younger than he, which I remembered. My third boyfriend was 4 months younger than I but he stood 6'8" and 250 lbs - and he was a handsome Southerner. I couldn't understand it when he said he preferred my hair swept back with a barrette, as it completely stripped me of my prowess and sex appeal. I felt like a little girl, but wore my hair like that anyway because I wanted him to be attracted to me always. By my every definition he is a REAL man, and I couldn't understand why he wasn't attracted to my sexy "womanliness." Why did he react passionately only when I appeared childlike? Two days ago, out of bitter frustration and confusion, I searched for the book and began practicing what it preached. I've worn my hair in barrettes and worn conservative, feminine clothing. The affect so far has been astonishing. A couple boys on my university campus exclaimed how attractive I looked; and my southern ex was completely floored, and invited me out to lunch. Additionally, I saw one slightly older fellow who I see and chat with periodically on campus. The first day he couldn't get over how beautiful I looked and proceeded to hug me (he never even attempted to touch me before.) Today, the second day, I acted a bit childlike. I commented that I was a terrible wimp where cold weather was concerned - complete with a tilt of the head and a pouting mouth. He nearly proposed marriage! So, as I reflect and attempt to put this puzzle together two thoughts come to mind. 1) This must be why when my high school girlfriend showed me two pictures of her and her boyfriend, we couldn't fathom why he preferred the photo of her hair done in a "childish" coif rather than full and sexy, as we thought it so much more lovely and becoming. 2) The fact that southern women are alluring is well known, and what makes them alluring is their femininity and childlike qualities. They are said to be made of steel, but that refers mostly to crises - and as Helen Andelin said - guys need that "sweet promise" that a woman can handle a crisis. So, maybe this is what my southern guy

I am a young wife and wish I had this book before I married! I read Helen Andelin's sequel to this book, Fascinating Womanhood, which focuses more on wives, and after 6 years of a rocky and dissatisfying marriage, within a week my husband and I went from not speaking to laughing together and loving each other's company! If you are attracted to REAL men then you need this book! Other reviewers may criticize this book but those poor women are on a power trip and need to hold every man (...)in order to feel the world is safe. Helen Andelin and I feel that there is another way, a blissful way to achieve harmony with the opposite sex: UNDERSTANDING MEN and complementing their masculinity! I have often admired women who seemed adored by men (the few there be that I knew!) and sought out all kinds of books that extol the virtues of femininity but after reading them found that when it comes down to the nitty gritty there was no actual direction or specifics to begin creating this new femininity! I came to feel that while most red blooded American girls want to be fascinatingly feminine none of us have got a clue what that even means! Our culture has moved so far away from femininity that men have even become confused as to what it means to be masculine! They swing to extremes to try to feel fulfilled and accepted but end up just as confused and miserable as we women have made ourselves! Marriages split not just once but over and over regardless of religious, social, or economical backgrounds. The author here offers an alternative to the current trends in attracting men. Instead of getting implants or a nose job or showing off as much skin as you can legally get away with she focuses on what makes a woman fascinatingly feminine from the way we walk to how we respond to hurtful remarks. If you want a man to listen when you talk, think you're cute when you're mad, and adore the person that you are then this book will be your best friend! It is a classic with fifty's clothing and hair styles but modernize it a little and it's timeless!

This book really gives the dignity of femininity back to girls/women. It show girls how to be ladies and truly the kind of girl a man will seek to take for his own. It opens the door for girls/women of all ages to become "Angela Human". Angela represents our Angelic qualities, Human represents the Human qualities and when combined these qualities create a fascinating woman that men can't help but love. It also teaches us how to find true happiness in everyday life.In my own experience, I started using the techniques in the book and it not only improved how I related to men in general, it improved how I related to my own family members and friends. This book is essential for girls/women especially in today's society when the parents are not so involved in the selection of the daughter's life long mate. Girls can use that which comes naturally to them, with just a little bit of formation and find their soul mate and companion for life and know how to keep him. This book is a MUST HAVE. I encourage you to take advantage of the priceless wisdom in this book. Hopefully, it will come back to print soon.