The Eldercare Handbook: Difficult Choices, Compassionate Solutions

6+ stars****** My parents recently moved into an assisted living facility. I wish I had read this book before instead of just after so I could have acted sooner. It gave me strength as my mother cried to know that this too shall pass and it is truly the wisest, safest, and healthest action to take. Each day is a little better. If I had read the book earlier I would have not made excuses for the mounting behavior changes, seen through her intelligent masking of memory loss, and helped my Dad make the difficult decision earlier, probably making the move easier for both of them. Stella's gift to us of her experience through the stories makes it an easy and pleasent read. As every pregant woman reads "What To Do When You're Expecting" so should every adult with 70+ parents read "The Eldercare Handbook". At least then you'll know it's normal and can make loving, practical decisions.

I bought several books of this type and this one is by far the most helpful and informative. It was invaluable in my visits to assisted living and nursing home facilities - letting me know what to look for and what questions to ask. But there is so much more to this book than just that. If I could only buy one book to help me understand how I can help my parents this would definitely be it.

Stella Henry has answered so many important questions about how to deal with our aging parent's needs as well as our own. This is a MUST READ for every adult child with a parent that may need our help. She deals with the emotional and physical aspects for both the parent and adult child's needs. The insite into how and when to choose a care facilty is invaluable.

What an eye opener! Through this book, Stella Henry holds the hand of the reader and says, "I've been there, what you feel is normal, you can do this, and here's how." Gently, she explains the joys, challenges and pitfalls of caring for the elderly. She unfolds the changing relationships between parent and child and illuminates shifting sibling roles. Perhaps most importantly, she tells the caregiver (usually a wife, daughter, or daughter-in-law) when it may no longer be safe to care for a loved one at home--when creating a hospital at home still cannot give a loved one the care he or she needs. At the same time, she warns that not all nursing homes and assisted living facilities are created equal and that we need to become sophisticated, knowledgeable consumers in order to choose an appropriate care center. The Eldercare Handbook answered questions before I even thought of them. I have already given this book to six friends.

Five "Well-Prepared" Stars. No, make that Six Stars!! This book belongs on the shelf or a CD disc of any family with elderly parents, relatives, or friends. Or those approaching elderly status. The Eldercare Handbook arrives just as we are informed there are over 22.4 million households caring for elderly relatives or friends, with that number expected to explode as the 'boomers' begin living longer than previous groups. That's ONE IN FOUR households and that's why this book needs to be read now by everyone and kept on the shelf or on digital media for future use. We're all on the clock. It's said family caregivers will spend more time caring for their elderly loved ones than raising their children, as life spans extend. Even those who have already begun to travel down this road can learn some things from this book that may have not confronted them yet. Especially important is the personal story of Nurse Henry in the beginning and the short "cast studies" throughout the book. Chapter 2, "Red Flags: Ten Signs To Watch For In Your Parents" hits the nail on the head. Some important signs are changes in eating habits, paying bills, memory problems, medications not taken, and hygiene. The information in Chapter 8 on the "Three Stages of Demetia" must be remembered. "Caregiver Burnout" is another important chapter that shows how a caregiver can easily become a patient. "The Long Term Care" chapter(s) explore the three levels very well. One stunning fact is that men are rarely caregivers, with that task most commonly falling to "spouses, daughters, and daughters-in-law, in that order". Not in my household. A key person that is mentioned is the Hospital Discharge Planner (my caps) at the rehab facility following a stroke, who is an expert on Medicare entitlements and local services, and has tons of advice on home care assistance. There is so much more in this handbook that we all need to read and give careful consideration to each point. As someone who is already a primary caregiver, I believe this book is an excellent overview on eldercare and gives very good specific guidance. SIX Stars!!!! (Notes: *Pay careful attention to the medical disclaimer at the beginning of the book, this is guidance that should be augmented by a doctor's advice. *This review is based on a eBook download for Adobe Reader 7. Save a tree, Download your books and burn to a CD!)