The Complete Lesbian and Gay Parenting Guide

Although this book has only been out for 5 years, it has quickly established itself as a classic. A readable and useful reference for scholars who study LGBT parenting, as well as LGBT parents themselves and prospective LGBT parents, it addresses an impressively comprehensive number of issues across the LGBT parent family life cycle, including: family building options and barriers; challenges along the path to becoming a parent; creating and finding support and community; and legal issues facing LGBT parent families. It deals with complex topics such as transracial adoption with incredible thoughtfulness, sensitivity, and frankness. This book is an indispensable resource and one which can be read and reread over time.

I purchased this LGBT parenting book and read it so I would be able to recommend it to my therapy clients. Given that our son just turned 17, I wasn't thinking I would be reading the book as a benefit to myself. Was I ever wrong! It is a gem among books and touched my heart in profound ways. It also made me laugh, sometimes uproariously and other times knowingly. As a gay man who is co-parenting with a bi woman, I found passages that felt like they were right out of our experiences. It is especially valuable that this book talks about spirituality, and about our children being the people they are and how we need to support them, not try to make them what we think they should be. This book is a gift and I have listed it on the GLBT resources web page for the counseling center where I work.

Prepublication Reviews "Finally a handbook for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender parents that addresses the real struggles and joys our families face. The Complete Lesbian and Gay Parenting Guide is both deeply serious, and belly-laugh funny, while remaining filled with useful advice and heartwarming personal stories." ---Rosie O'Donnell "Arlene Lev has written a ground-breaking handbook on lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender parenting that moves beyond proving that we have a right to parent and examines the day-to-day realities of life with children. Lev, a family therapist with twenty years experience working with alternative families, describes the emerging diversity of LGBT families, options for becoming parents, single parenting, coming-out, and infertility, as well as humorously addressing issues such as coping with colic and finding time for adult intimacy. "Filled with the personal stories of diverse LGBT parents, Lev - a fierce advocate for our families -- challenges us to create secure and healthy environments for our children despite outside homophobia. Now, for the first time in print, with practical advice and a raw honesty, The Complete Lesbian and Gay Parenting Guide is a must-read for all LGBT people -- those with kids, those who want kids, and those who have watched your friends sucked into the vortex of parenting. "Lev has created a guide that is up to the minute, inclusive, comprehensive, warm, funny and downright essential for anyone involved with or interested in LGBT parenting." April Martin, Author The Lesbian and Gay Parenting Handbook (Harper-Collins, 1993) "Arlene Istar Lev brings the now generation-old phenomenon of LGBT parenting fully up-to-date. It's an ideal, complete reference resource for queer people pursuing parenthood, or those already raising kids. It's inclusive, it's smart, it's accessible, and it doesn't shy away from the hard material. Everything LGBT parents and parents-to-be need to know about issues unique to our families - it's all there." Terry Boggis, Director, Center Kids the family program of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Community Centre, New York "Parenting is a real-time activity and a challenge for anyone who takes it seriously. Lev makes bold statements about real people in real-time situations. The humanity inherent in loving and raising children is not something reserved for a privileged few, but IS experienced by LGBT people. In a time of increasing conservative, religious right angst over who should be allowed to be human and what information and choices we all should be entitled to have about our own lives; this book provides a look at aspects of parenting that we can't always know about in advance. And it is a testament to the ongoing power of parental love." Jamison Green, Author of Becoming a Visible Man (Vanderbilt University Press, 2004)

I, personally, found this book to be exceptional. It is refreshing to find a book that has humor and real-life experience enmeshed with everything the GLBT parents needs to know in this day and age. These are scary times, and with all the gloom and doom we face as gay parents it is nice to find a book that can be enjoyable AND informative. I find it distressing when discussing this book with others that sometimes personal life-experience has hindered their ability to digest the information provided. It is important to remember that all information given has been researched thoroughly, not only formally, but through day-to-day experience of Ms. Lev, her family, and others. When reading this book we need to keep in mind that the topics covered affect millions of families of all races and genders. We need to remain as objective as we can and digest as much as we can - not only for our own families but to help us educate others. I am thankful for not only this book, but many others that Ms. Lev has given us, and I think we should applaud, rather than criticize, her efforts to give the most accurate, all-encompassing information possible to her readers. It is also important to realize that her words not only come from a literary position, but from a intensely personal one as well.