Sudden Endings: Wife Rejection in Happy Marriages

I couldn't put this book down, as it perfectly describes the breakup experienced by close friend of mine, and closely describes my own recent experience. I agree completely with Mr. Hoag, who says that the Kirkus reviewer was wide of the mark. The Kirkus reviewer's failure to understand the book actually supports Bennett's point, and underscores the difficulty she and other women encountered in finding empathetic friends and therapists. Those who haven't seen the behavior chronicled in the book will surely have difficulty believing it. If you have been through (or are going through) sudden rejection in a marriage that seemed happy, this book: - Lets you know you are not at all alone - Guides you in understanding the emotional mechanics that may have led your spouse to discard you I see that there is now a book in print by Madeline Bennett, titled "Sudden Endings: Why Husbands, Wives, and Lovers Walk Out on Long, Loving Relationships". If this is the same book, I'd like own it, but if it is extensively updated to include husband abandonment, I'll stick with the original.

I do not have personal experience of wife rejection, but as a student of marriage, I found this book fascinating and true to what I know of marriage and relationships. There is a wealth of research in the form of in-depth interviews, a very good way to research a topic. The author is herself calling for more clinical study on the subject, her book is a wonderful beginning, and may be the only resource a woman in this situation can find at this time. This book is WELL WORTH her time, and will surely give her strength to feel less alone and less likely to take the rejection personally (if that were possible) because it gives some glimmer of understanding to why such an unthinkable thing could happen.

The "Kirkus Reviews, May 1, 1991" review of this book couldn't be more wide of the mark. It questions the credibility of the author precisely for having direct personal experience of her subject. The reviewer is incredulous, one can only speculate, through inexperience.The central premise of Sudden Endings is, "It takes two to make a marriage work... But it only takes one to break it up." Bennett backs up this premise convincingly in the face of entrenched and widespread cultural beliefs that, in every case, it takes two to end a marriage -- that if your spouse abandoned your long and happy marriage you *must* somehow have been at equal fault -- a notion as harmful as it is untrue.If you were happily married for 10 or more years and your spouse suddenly abandoned your marriage, find a copy of this book.