Speak Peace in a World of Conflict: What You Say Next Will Change Your World

This book is not a 'read only' book, it is a 'do it/work on it' book. It's about making peace at three different, but so very much connected and intertwined, levels: a world of conflict; a personal relationship of conflict; a person of conflict. So many people speak of peace or about peace, but they bring no peace. And why not? Because one has to be at peace with oneself before one can truly bring peace in ones relationship or in the world. This book gives us the tools to do just that. We can make peace with ourselves and from there bring it into 'the outer world'. This is one of the most important books I have read for a long, long time. This book is learning (I am not finished yet by far..) me to be at peace with myself, which is something completely different from 'control myself' or terms like that. It gives me a milder, softer point of view about who I am, what I do, and why I did things that I did, in the way that I did them. Because of that, or together with that, it is also learning me to understand, and connect with, other people from a different, milder, softer point of view. And yet at the same time it makes me stronger. It is not about a weak 'peace' such as in 'avoiding conflict' or 'giving in'. But about a strong peace, because we can (learn to) see clearer what is happening inside ourselves and the other person(s) and act in a way that both we and our 'opponents' come out winning. This book is not only about speaking peace in a world of conflict. This is a book about finding peace within yourself and through that, being able to truly bring peace into your world, it is a book about healing and a book about 'winning together'; a book about hope for a split up and violent world. I love it and recommend it with all my heart.

Rosenberg has explored and describes his very effective methodology for healing conflicts between individuals and groups by going beyond entrenched opinion to reach the common humanity in exceptionally diverse conditions even to the extent of extreme history of recent violence between participants. For example one lady felt compelled to warn Marshall that she may try to kill him after being raped and witnessing the brutal murder of a close friend in war torn Africa, yet Rosenberg's empathic and clear procedures brought her to a place of healing and comfort where such would have seemed not possible. This just one of numerous compelling real life stories. Obviously the methods may also be used in less extreme interpersonal areas. I found the illustration of a fifteen month conflict resolved between older traditional software engineers and the younger programmers with a "better way" quite enlightening and applicable to broader usage in my own thinking and approach to interpersonal issues.

"Speak Peace In A World Of Conflict" is a necessary book in these challenging times. There is so much tension in the world that it is difficult to think positive, much less speak in a manner that is compassionate. You may be familiar with Rosenberg's other book, "Non-Violent Communication". Well, that book transformed my thinking about how I communicated with others, especially with my family. I always prided myself on my 'clear communication' but I didn't realize that my communication was filled with sarcasm, aggression and control. After reading that book, I learned how to LISTEN emphatically and to realize that we are all basically trying to 'get our needs met' when we communicate. This created a paradigm shift in myself and I learned to listen also to my own needs, which helped me to be more clear, more kind and less abrasive. "Speak Peace" is a great follow-up book to "Non Violent Communication". It gives real life examples and more depth to the whole concept. If you are uncertain about NVC, this book will clarify it further. I am continuing to apply the principles and I have noticed a new warmth and joy in my family relationships. Recently, we had a very trying situation that brought out a lot of anger, hard feelings and misunderstandings - by following NVC, I was able to reduce the negativity and diffuse the conflict. Very healing stuff. I recommend any of Rosenberg's books.

Reading Marshall Rosenberg's newly released book, Speak Peace in a World of Conflict helped me to deepen my understanding of the "heart of mediation" and inspired hope that positive social change was achievable. Rosenberg reveals an abundance of practical strategies that can transform your conflict resolution practice against a background of profound insight into his theory of human conflict and violence. Marshall Rosenberg has tirelessly traveled the globe mediating disputes and training practitioners in Nonviolent Communication for more than forty years. In this new work, he offers an overview of the "mechanics" of the NVC process interwoven with a tapestry of tales illustrating the "consciousness" of NVC and its real world application. Rosenberg also adds theory concerning the roots of violence, the role of language, "domination systems" and "enemy images", while offering unique strategies for dispute resolution used by everyone from Israeli kindergartners to African tribal chieftains. Three themes delineate the book's structure. The first section of the book covers the "Mechanics of Speaking Peace", including an overview of the Nonviolent Communication process developed by Rosenberg. Featured throughout this section are exercises that invite the reader to have a direct experience of the potential of the process to deepen self-awareness and open to new possibilities for how we interact with one another. In Part 2, Rosenberg focuses on "Applying Nonviolent Communication". First, he shows how the NVC process can be utilized for working on oneself to deepen a connection to "divine energy", a phrase Rosenberg uses to describe the "spiritual basis" of NVC. He defines this divine energy as "our natural life-serving energy", and asserts, "this divine energy is manifest in the joy we feel in giving to one another." Rosenberg continues, "Unfortunately, many of us are blocked from that divine energy by the way we've been taught to think". He offers Nonviolent Communication as a process for connecting with this divine energy, first in oneself, and then within the context of interpersonal relationships and social change. He covers the practice of empathy, a skillful process required to sustain connection in a mediation context. Rosenberg also explains the roots of violence contained in the language we have all been educated to speak. Finally, in "Speaking Peace for Social Change", he focuses on effective strategies for facilitating social change. Including examples from the fields of education and intertribal conflict, he highlights our habitual tendency to manufacture "enemy images" which limit our capacity to be effective agents of social change. He shows how the NVC process can be used to dismantle these enemy images and build a bridge of connection, human to human. He also gives explicit ideas for how to use the NVC process in mediating disputes at all levels of human interaction, including a powerful and unique strategy to employ

I am usually critiquing, but on this book, I only have positive feelings. Speak Peace... has helped me to get in touch with my inner softer caring self & really understand who others are and how they feel. I have dozens of other books (Tolle, Thich Nhat Hanh, etc) which are excellent, and Speak Peace surpasses them, for me. I had been dealing with a lot of pain and other's anger, so maybe this book was simply especially aligned with what I was seeking, but it is excellent in itself. It is written in a very flowing manner; it is not a technical manual, and it's not an instruction book. It's very easy to read, with the concepts expressed well and in small bites, but without losing any meaning. The care of the author flows through the way he writes, and that makes it also easy and comforting to read... it's like listening to someone speak who is very calm and caring. The book is realistic. The ideas are not suggesting to pretend things are rosy, or to manipulate others, or to reward them or use use hidden techniques to affect them. It focuses on an approach of simple understanding, and wanting to understand more. If you were to tell another person what ideas you were applying, they would not feel manipulated.. the idea is mostly that you care and want to understand. The ideas are not forced either. Once I read them, I was more-so remembering things I already knew, but had forgot. Applying them is just natural, there's no forcing it. The book is suitible for picking up for a few minutes, or for reading all the way through. You can read a single page and get entire ideas in their completeness. The first day I read a few pages, I transformed a difficult relationship with a family member. And the next day with an even more difficult family member. The book helped me release so much anger, blaming, sarcasm, etc that I had slowly built up inside me, and I can see clearly that they were based on mis-understanding.. not truly understanding the other person.. and choosing to judge them as not being worth effort. I honestly would recommend this book, before any other book on dealing with conflict or anger/blaming/judging. The only exception would be hurt feelings related to someone you cannot speak with, like people you see on TV and such. For that I might suggest Thich Nhat Hanh and other authors. If you are struggling with conflicts, or anger blaming or judging, then this book may be what you are needing. ..my greatest thanks to all the people who helped this book be published...