Sixty-Five Roses: A Sister's Memoir

Sixtyfive Roses is a mesmerizing book. With a writing style that is fluid, graceful, and natural, Heather Summerhayes Cariou's memoir reads like a novel. She perfectly balances the heartbreaking events with a warm sense of humor. Often in memoirs where a specific illness plays a large role, the writer forgets that the audience is not so much interested in reading about a disease, they are interested in reading about people who are dealing with a disease. Summerhayes Cariou expertly shares with us a family story where I care so deeply about every one involved; she let's us understand that Pam's fight with cystic fibrosis was not just her own - it was a family battle. Many times throughout the book I shook my head, realizing just how young her parents were as they dealt with crisis after crisis. The way that she so carefully recorded and crafted her sister Pam's thoughts and reflections gave me a strong awareness of who she truly was. But then again, I felt that way with all her family. Her ability to make the reader feel a part of her life - as if we are living at 16 Brier Crescent, or sitting on the wishing rock with her, baking cookies in faded-colored bowls, or shuttling back and forth to the hospital, is a testament to her descriptive writing abilities. Truly, the entire book flashed through my mind like a movie. The way she put her own life out there - her foibles, her vulnerabilities, her shortcomings - is incredibly brave and what makes us, the reader, love her all the more. She reminds us that no one gets through life without obstacles, without pain, without struggle. We find her extremely relatable in regards to our own wounds and issues. It makes us cheer for her. I would often read for hours, not wanting to put the book down. I think I held off on reading the last 40 pages or so, savoring it; one of those books you don't want to end, but can't wait to finish.

I will not add to the above synopsis of the book but just say I could not put this book down. It was so moving. Even though I knew the ending I was totally caught up in the lives of this family. I got caught up in the sadness and beauty of the writing and have to admit all my sadnesses came into play and I was caught up in their grief as well as my own. The book is extremely well written and there are many places that I have underlined as the philosphy and strength of the author and her sister are so helpful to me. It should be a book helpful for any family struggling with a chronic illness. The family was so caught up in their everyday living trying to keep the ill sister Pam alive that the other children were unintentionally neglected and paid a heavy price for it. The strength of the parents is overwhelming. I was grateful for having found the book and read it.

Bonds between sisters can be deeply profound. Life changing, life sustaining relationships with our sisters prove this. Heather Summerhayes Cariou's memoir, "Sixtyfive Roses" demonstrates the bond of sisterhood in a way that readers will never forget. When your sibling, your best friend, is given months to survive, and you vow to die along with her, life becomes a struggle to live. When Pam was just four years old, and Heather was six, Pam was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis, which Pam pronounced Sixtyfive Roses. It wasn't a new experience, handling Pam's illness, since she had been ill all along, but it now had a name, and a death sentence. Heather's family began to learn everything about Cystic Fibrosis; became founders of the Canadian Cystic Fibrosis Foundation and fought for Pam's life with every fiber of their being. Heather describes how helpless it felt to lay awake listening to her sister breathing, ready to jump up to get her parents, and how scared she was to wake in the morning to find Pam gone from life. The treatments they were to give Pam at home, the long hospital stays fighting infections, the struggle to pay bills, and the toll on everyone's lives shook the foundation of their family but at the same time made them all the stronger. Heather's internal struggle with her feelings and adolescence brought forth an angry young woman; the constant turmoil affected each family member in different ways. The tradition of having tea became a soothing ointment for many moments. Was it enough to soothe their souls? This memoir is an astounding testament to the strength of family, but also to the reality of illness and a person's spiritual growth. Witnessing Pam finding her own peace and subsequently Heather's whole family is the gift Pam left for us all, wrapped up and crafted into "Sixtyfive Roses" by Heather Summerhayes Cariou. This book is about depth of love and dedication, it is about sisterhood and family, it is about Cystic Fibrosis and the research that is being done, it is about one family's selfless dedication, and it is about Pam. Excellently written, with a foreword by Celine Dion, who has also been touched by Cystic Fibrosis in her family, readers will not be able to put the book down. One can't help but be moved in reading it.

While 2 women grace the cover, SIXTYFIVE ROSES is no more just for women than Mitch Albom's SUNDAYS WITH MORRIE is for men. The family story of dealing with illness and crisis is also a personal story of growth and hope. I couldn't put it down. This brave family's interaction reminded me of my family and my life, both the positive and the challenges. The hard-hitting writing is both: strong and poetic, beautiful and real. SIXTYFIVE ROSES moved me beyond my expectation. It inspired me to be a better person, to nurture my relationships and self, and to remember that with action and belief, anything is possible.

As a parent to a child with Cystic Fibrosis, I'm always hesitant to read something when the title already tells me how it ends... but I heard from a friend with CF that it was amazing, so I dove in right after I got my hands on a copy of the book... and am I glad that I did! Heather writes with amazing clarity and has a beautiful talent for drawing the reader into the situation in a way that makes you feel as if you are truly there. The honesty of Heather's portrayal of the family's struggles strikes a deep chord for those who have walked in similar shoes, and while the book is about their specific journey with CF, the lessons to be taken from this book would easily apply to other chronically ill families as well. I'm especially grateful for Heather's intense and gruelingly honest feelings about growing up as Pam's older sister. The way she captures her mother's feelings and weaves them all together is nothing short of magical. The perspective I've gained from reading this book for the first time has left me earnestly more aware of the potential struggles my oldest child might face while she grows up with her little sister with CF. I would highly recommend this book to anyone dealing with chronic illness ~ families, as well as care providers.