Shock Waves: A Practical Guide to Living with a Loved One's PTSD

Cynthia Orange has written a beautiful book, unique in it's scope and literary quality. With an insider's viewpoint, she writes a book of essential help for caretakers of victims who have experienced the horrors of a wide variety of trauma. The core message of self care while reaching out to loved ones who are traveling through a personal healing process is vital and important. Not limiting the definition of trauma to war veterans, she explains how PTSD can have a wide variety of sources which can all have an affect on loving relationships. Relating personal stories of those who have "been there", she writes with a poet's flow while giving practical suggestions for survival when experiencing secondary trauma. Orange clearly shows how these "Shock Waves" ripple through the lives of all those touched by Post Traumatic Stress. This is an amazing, thoughtful, and inspiring book which will leave the readers with a message of hope.

If "Shock Waves" were available in the years after I returned from Vietnam, it would have helped me heal from the PTSD I didn't know had infected me. It would have helped me realize how I let the adverse effects of my PTSD trickle down on both my wife and our daughter. It would have helped me mature emotionally as I recovered from the psychic wounds of war. Orange's book soars at three altitudes--mind, heart, and action. In down-to-earth language, she explains post-traumatic stress, offers empowering stories by people dealing with the effects of trauma, and, with a wisdom forged in the caldron of her own decades-long struggle with her husband's PTSD, describes ways to cope and grow with compassion. This book deals with loss and feelings. As Orange writes, "Trauma takes things from us--among them, time, security, trust, certainty, and a sense of self--and leaves in its place doubt, fear, loss, and a sense of confusion, and new responsibilities." Its focus on how the caretaker must navigate the emotional storms and undercurrents caused by their loved one's trauma includes an important contribution--it gives the caretaker much-needed permission for self-care. Her practical lists and guides belong on refrigerators and bulletin boards everywhere. For people recovering from PTSD, like me, the book provides clear direction. While the feelings generated from my combat-induced trauma are natural and blameless, I am fully responsible for my behavior and to get the help I need. PTSD is a normal response to an abnormal experience, not an excuse for a "pity party." PTSD is a mental disorder, not an excuse for a copout or to minimize the "less traumatic" experiences of others. Orange's book helped me become a more full-spectrum adult in touch with all of my feelings, not just the traditional male ones sanctioned by society. My reanimated feelings help me honor the pain of my past trauma and simultaneously be present and open to today's opportunities for joy and serenity. Read this book and, as Orange writes, "Let the healing begin."

This was book was such a easy read. I think most of us are touched in some way by PTSD. This book demonstrates that is isn't only a product of war but can happen from any traumatic event. This is a helpful guide for all family members and I highly recommend it.

I was really moved by this book. We don't have family members with PTSD but have friends that do. I probably was more curious than anything, while wanting to be a good friend. I found much more than I expected. There is much that we all can learn from this book. In our family severe depression has been an unwelcome visitor. Finding the balance to be supportive and helpful, while not making it worse is painfully challenging. I also found it crucial to remember to take care of myself in order to be helpful to my loved ones in depression. For me that may be the most difficult, guilt-ladened task. I needed this book more than I knew.