Share My Lonesome Valley: The Slow Grief of Long-Term Care

Knowing that I am caring for my 86-year old mother who is struggling with late stage lung cancer and emphysema, a friend of mine recommended this book. I have read it through twice, made notes, and referenced several sections just this last month. It has made a huge impact in giving me a more positive daily perspective for numerous reasons. Douglas Manning has clearly experienced what he has put into this book: insight into what the responsible person feels they have lost, validating your feelings, making it OK to feel anger, understanding that your grief is continuous every day; and, finally, how those around you can be the most supportive by just being there for you. This book is invaluable for anyone providing long-term care for someone they love, and I have ordered several more to give to others who are going through the same experience.

Doug Manning spoke to my heart at a time I truly needed it. I thought nobody understood what I was going through -- he does, and puts it into words both simple and eloquent. A must-read for any caregiver, son or daughter, whose parent(s) are suffering a long, slow death with increasing incapacity and need of care. He encourages us not to stick our heads in the sand, but to face up to reality, and gives us tools with which to help both our loved one and ourselves.

This book is excellent for all persons dealing with long term care giving issues. As a provider of long term mental health services in nursing homes, the issues described in this book are on target. Care givers are often overlooked in the process of caring for others, including well intentioned family members and friends who are experiencing their own issues, but not recognizing them. It is well written, and not lengthy. It describes the process of grief, emotional ups and downs, and physical demands of care giving.