S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-To-Know Sexuality Guide to Get You Through Your Teens and Twenties

There are so many things to recommend this book aimed at youth 16 - 22 (but containing info valuable to a much wider age range) that it's difficult to know where to begin. S.E.X. contains a lot of the information you find in guides aimed at a young readership - anatomy lessons, safer sex guidelines, a breakdown of birth control options, definitions of various sexual activities and infections. The difference here is Heather Corinna's (who as the founder of the world's most awesome sex ed site, Scarleteen, has seen and heard it all) dedication to tugging the rest of society closer to her dream of a world where everyone is "healthy, happy and whole in themselves and their sexuality: in body, heart, and mind." To that end the book is truly inclusive. In a section on sexual identity Corinna points out that "this isn't the gay chapter" and indeed the book doesn't assume a heterosexual default the way many do - or root itself in traditional gender roles. Nor does it assume that sex is better when connected with love or marriage. The emphasis is unfailingly on communication, being as safe as possible, respecting your own and others' boundaries and fitting sex into the rest of your life in a healthy and enjoyable way. The slant seems so balanced and logical that it's a wonder society at large is in such a mess when it comes to sex and sexuality. But popular culture with its constant projection of a hyper-sexuality which is unvarying and prescriptive (dictating what sort of bodies we should have, the kinds of activities we should be engaging in and who should be performing them - and how) would seem to be the enemy of this logic. To counter these negative messages and arrive at a healthy body image, Heather suggests reducing TV watching and binning your fashion magazines, noticing the diversity around you in your everyday life, focusing on things other than appearance and concentrating on physical activities you enjoy (whether that be team sports, canoeing, whatever). Of course there's a lot of sex in this book and sexual activities are catalogued along with their pregnancy and STI risk. You'll learn that the idea that female virgins are supposed to be "tight" is pure myth. "A woman having first intercourse very well might be tight, but that is likely due more to nervousness, fear, and anxiety than it is to whether or not she has had partnered sex before." If a woman's relaxed, aroused and lubricated enough with a patient partner first-time sex doesn't need to be painful. The idea of premature ejaculation is "a bit bogus" too. There's no "minimum time that is acceptable for erection" and sexual activity can continue in other ways afterwards. There's no reason that all (or any) of the fun has to spring from penetration. Unfortunately, not at all sex is consensual and S.E.X. also discusses healing from abuse and rape. "One-half of all rape victims are raped between the ages of fourteen and seventeen." Roughly a third of "high-school and college student

This is the book I always wanted (but never found) when I was a teenager -- straightforward, down-to-earth, and perhaps most importantly, incredibly comprehensive. Even at 29, after more than a decade of relationships with people of assorted genders and a stint as a volunteer at Scarleteen, I learned new things from reading S.E.X., and am very happy to have it as a resource on my bookshelves next to the classics like Our Bodies, Ourselves. I've already given a copy to my partner's younger brother, and while my best friend's son is a little too young to do anything but chew on it, he'll be getting a copy too in a few years. I highly recommend this to anyone who wants to learn more about sexuality and sexual health.

Growing up with a mother who volunteered as a counselor for Planned Parenthood, you'd think I would have had a good education in the area of sexuality - but far from it, really the only thing I heard about was birth control. Sexuality is such a huge part of every human being though, it's amazing that we leave the "education" to pop culture. Now the parent of 3 teenaged daughters, I was absolutely thrilled to get a copy of this book. I plan on getting a couple MORE copies, since I haven't been able to pry it from my middle daughter's hands since giving it to her. As many previous reviewers have mentioned, the book covers everything - not just STIs and birth control, but the psychological and emotional ramifications of becoming sexually active as well. It's thoughtful and not at all condescending, and I have to wonder how much better the world might be if kids had THIS as their sex education instead of music videos. Corinna is fearless when it comes to discussing the gamut of topics, so as a parent I had to be fearless as well, knowing in my heart and head that accurate information is the best gift I could give my daughters.

Many years ago, when I started working as a moderator on a teen debate site, the person whose job I was taking over told me to direct all sex-ed related queries to a site called Scarleteen.com, because they would answer the questions better than we ever could. I myself did not check out that site until about a year and a half ago, and when I did, I regretted not having visited in my teens: The site offered everything I was was was desperately looking for but could not find - honest, down-to-earth, realistic advice on all things concerning sex, sexuality, birth control, safety and relationships. This miracle-site is the brainchild of one Heather Corinna, sex-educator extraordinaire. And now Heather has finally managed to publish the sex-ed guide to end all guides. Like her site, the book is open, honest and straight-forward. It answers all questions without skirting truths or hiding facts. It's body-positive and inclusive, and it is always respectful and never judgemental. In short, this book is the companion you want to have with you during your teen years, and well beyond. It you want to do yourself or a teen in your life a favour, buy this book.

I've had the pleasure of previewing Heather Corinna's book, and must say it's one of the most necessary pieces today. It goes far above and beyond the mini-pamplets distributed to teen boys and girls in schools -- often funded by companies that manufacture hygiene products and would have puberty and all that follows be a mystery to be masked. Not so, here. S.E.X. goes into all the details that many refuse to believe come into young adults' lives, from a balanced view of orientation and sexual identity, the importance of overall general and sexual health related to sexuality, and addresses the ever-alarming increase in abuse in teen relationships. The book is very well-written and never talks down to young people; it's perhaps the only one of its kind I've read that is willing to address teens and young people as full-fledged adults with the same problems adult life presents. It is so much more than a guide to plain sexuality; its integration of all that is involved, including increasing problems with teen body image, makes it darn near a guide to high school and college life. Please, consider purchasing not only a copy for yourself and/or a young adult close to you, consider donating one to your public library. There is too much crucial information contained herein to withhold.