Hank Jones isn't your typical alien abductee. There were no tractor beams, probes, or government conspiracies involved-no, Hank met his kidnappers at a bar. They weren't exactly hard to miss-Elvis, a seven-foot tall Elvis clone, and Lawrence, a grounded European gent, were the only UCLA supporters in a bar full of Hoosiers. Still, Hank has nothing better to do. It's spring break, there's a pile of freshman essays on his desk, and his thesis...