Raising a Nonviolent Child: Volume 9

I read this book after my son, who was 4 at the time, with an older cousin, killed a duck of ours (not maliciously, just played way too roughly with it). You won't hear his wisdom or common sense from any other authors. If you are looking for psychobabble, look elsewhere. If you think children should be coddled and babied all the way into adulthood (like "everyone else" seems to be doing now), then this isn't for you. If you think children need to be ridiculously praised for every move they make, you should really read this book - it debunks that notion, and turns most other conventional parenting practices of today upside down. Just look at your neighbors and the classmates of your children, who are likely helpless, disrespectful, often overweight, addicted to tv and video games, etc. I don't want my kids to be like that, so John Rosemond has shown me the better way, which is actually the way I was parented, without even realizing it. The book was a fascinating read, and I went through it quickly. At that point the only other book of his I had read was Making the Terrible Twos Terrific, and while it is the same general philosophies, there was much new wisdom in this book, particularly for older children. I loaned it to my sister who also enjoyed it. When visiting a friend in another state, who had a girl my son's age, she was so violent that we finally left after an hour. She actually flipped a glider rocker chair that my son was sitting in over and on top of him. I later sent this book to my friend, hoping she wouldn't be offended. She read it and told me it was very useful and helped her realize what she was doing wrong with her kids, and immediately upon putting his wisdom in practice she saw improvement, and began working on being a leader/parent, instead of a slave to her kids.

This book is excellent as most of Dr. Rosemond's book are. I enjoyed the easy read nature of the book. He gives specific ways to help your child get rid of bad behavior. This was very helpful to me. My daughter has improved behavior because of his suggestions. I highly recommend this book along with all others by Dr. John Rosemond.

"Data" is only as good as its control group or collector. Life experience *is* data, and as a parent, you will offer what *works for you* to other parents. Like Mr. Rosemond, I usually offer "personal perspectives" in the first person, not because I'm so self-centered that I think my own experience is all that matters, but because it's *my* perspective, from my own experiences. I can't project how a person will handle any given situation, and as long as *I'm* separate from *you*, we'll never have identical perspectives. We will, however, have similar experiences from time to time. Just as something someone has said to me will help me wade through my own muddle, I hope that others can draw on my ponderings when they need it. As for parenting books in general, I read them for guidelines, evaluate those guidelines and use them as I see fit. Although not all of us are biological parents, we are almost always entrusted with *someone's* children at *some* point in our lives, and I do recommend Rosemond's book for preparing for such times. His suggestions for re-empowering the mothers provide tools for setting and maintaining our own personal boundaries among "children" of all ages.