Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility

This book teaches you how to shut down their children's emotions for the convenience of the parents, when we need to be a safe space for our children's emotions and teach them how to cope with them. Instead of forcing them to repress their emotions, we need to become emotionally mature ourselves so we can usher the next generation into a healthier emotional state. The background of the book is an authoritarian conservative Christian perspective. I highly recommend this alternative for teaching respect, helping children feel safe, and allowing them to learn about expressing their emotions in a healthy way - The Connected Parent by Karyn Purvis.

Especially good to read when your kids are in grade school. It will help you successfully transmit love and affection to your kids while not being taken advantage of. Your kids will also end up more compassionate and helpful and be adults who know how to be happy and successful.

Never did I imagine a book would be so life changing for me. Simple concepts to implement and here I was yelling and kicking. Highly highly recommend this book for any adult specially Parents!

This book is a MUST READ for any parent. After years of being the 'drill instructor' to no avail, this book has given me the tools and strategies to try a different approach - one that works!!!! To the person that gave this book only 1 star????? Of course...EVERYTHING must be tempered with common sense...did you want the authors to teach you common sense, too? If so, look elsewhere. This book comes highly recommended.

Jim Fay believes that we must teach our children HOW to think, not just WHAT to think. I am a very "over-protective mom" and reading his book has encouraged me to stop making so many choices for my children. I am now better able to allow my child to fail and take ownership of the consequence that follows his actions without feeling so much guilt myself. Kids can definitely learn from their mistakes without losing their self-esteem. Although I do not agree nor use every strategy in this book (like "The German Shepard Technique"), I feel the Love and Logic philosophy has contributed positive change in the way we communicate with our children as well as to the degree of compliance we get from them. We like this book because there are many specific suggestions in the real life annecdotes demonstrating the exact words to try. We also recommend another book with quick-read suggestions for parents of 2, 3, 4, and 5-year-olds called 'The Pocket Parent.' This book is not written in paragraphs, but rather hundreds of short bullets of practical information. The philosophies of both authors are very similar--offering many sanity saving alternatives to yelling, bribing, threatening, critizing, and nagging that we often resort to at our wits' end.. Both books are helpful, humorous and worth keeping handy for when you need some quick advice or just some empathy on one of those really bad days when you think you are about to lose your mind!

This book provides sound parenting philosophy and easy to use guidelines to apply it. As a teacher, it is clear to me which students have been raised with loving and logical parents. So many parents confuse love with protection. Parenting with love and logic means allowing your kids to make choices ... and sometimes mistakes. Some may object to the "Basic German Shepard" tactics or the idea that claims that spanking is sometimes alright. Use what you wish from the book. I have never spanked my child, nor do I order him around like a dog. To avoid a power struggle with my son who didn't want to put on his clothes or coat for a 5 minute ride home from my sister's house, I used Love and Logic principles. On a cold January evening in Michigan I carried him to the car in his underwear. Moments later, he said, "I'm cold." I simply kept driving and said, ... Perhaps next time you will make a different choice?" A natural instinct would be to cover him up and protect him from the cold. He was not injured in any way. By sticking to the principle, however, he learned two very important lessons: 1) mom is not kidding around, and 2) it's smart to wear your clothes and a coat. Since that evening, we have not struggled to get dressed. Try it!

A year after our introduction to Love and Logic, my husband and I are firm believers. But I didn't start out that way. It seemed too easy, and at times, too harsh. I was reluctant to try what seemed to be pat answers to vexing parental challenges. But, after putting the principles into practice for a very short time, a little bit at a time, we saw an amazing improvement in our 6 year old son's behavior and self-esteem. Letting him experience the consequences of his actions while offering much love and empathy was a much better teacher than our lectures, tirades and punishments ever were. I would also suggest that parents of toddlers listen to the Cline/Fay tape: Toddlers, which applies the Love and Logic principles to that age group, and Parenting Teens with Love and Logic.