The rich always tip best when I smile. They slip a twenty, sometimes even a benjamin, into my pocket when their partners aren't looking. I'll give them a playful wink even if some aren't carrying what I'm interested in. Tonight though, tips may be sparse because I have been proclaimed the babysitter. "You've waited tables before, haven't you?" I ask the newbie, Noah or something. "I have not," he replies, puzzling me. Why Steven...