Our Last Best Shot: Guiding our Children Through Early Adolescence

I felt like I was reading "MY Last Best Shot" as I read through this book. I have three sons, ages 10, 12, & 13, and this book was lent to me by my middle son's teacher. I liked it so much I bought my own copy. Every chapter opened my eyes to something else I didn't know about or have not been doing with my sons. I strongly recommend this book to anyone with children near or at the pre-teen age level, particularly parents who find most parenting books boring, patronizing or unrealistic.

The author extensively interviewed and spent massive amounts of time with each of 12 middle schoolers and early high schoolers in LA. Durham, NC, and a small town in Kansas. We get deeply into the lives of these youngsters and their families. We share everything from their triumphs to their getting into very serious trouble (one was suspended from school for a year for bringing an unloaded gun to school). What we learn is that this age group is one in which kids start to assert some independence and both teachers and parents have to give up some control. Stepp puts it well .. we must let kids climb the mountain but still retain enough control to keep them away from the edge of the cliff. Kids this age must believe that we are listening to them and care about what they have to say. Kids need good role models including adults other than their parents. This age group is so crucial to a child's development. The need for more independence is so important yet the dangers of serious mistakes is ever present. What I like about this book is that Stepp makes her observations and offers insights and comments without inserting an excessive amount of ideology. Msny books of this genre have political agendas, both feminist and conservative, This book steers clear of such agendi. This book is important reading for both parents and teachers. I recommend it.

For Christmas 2000, I only requested a few gifts. Besides paper white bulbs and a red matte lipstick, I wanted this book. As a parent of younger children and a youth development consultant and writer, I had committed to reading it in the New Year!I read Last Best Shot in less than 2 days and enjoyed it immensely. In 12 profiles of young adolescents, the author touches on the turbulence but wonderful promise of young teens. She cuts through all the theoretical jargon with an amazingly graceful writing style. This is its finest strength---to communicate what experts in the field know about youth development in engaging storytelling profiles. This makes it a wonderful read for anyone, with children or without. Beautifully insightful, and at times poignant, the private look into the lives of these children gives you the freedom to draw many of your own conclusions. It is also extremely refreshing to see children from many backgrounds portrayed--Children of married families, divorced ones, white, city, rural, Hispanic and African American. My only wish is that we will see a followup. What will happen to all these children in three or four years?

I am neither a parent nor a teacher, but I found this well-written, insightful book eye-opening.I bought it as a "suggested reading" gift for the parents of a young girl I have been mentoring, but could not put it down after reading the introduction! Ms. Stepp's intermingling of real life examples with research from the experts revealed so many things that a non-parent can do to change the world by helping children navigate early adolescence. Her inclusion of African American children among her subjects, and her sensitive treatment of the special problems their lives present brought her book home for me.

This book is a must-read for parents of children approaching adolescence and for those in the throws of it, as well as teachers, grandparents, clergy, and others who come in contact with kids ages 10 to 15. By sharing her thoughtful, well-researched insights, Laura Sessions Stepp is able to help demystify what is often a difficult passage for both parents and teens.As the mother of three boys, 12, 15, and 17, I found this book enormously reassuring. By talking intimately with young teens and their families and friends, Ms. Stepp found that despite the pressures and challenges to succeed, fit in, and experiment with independence, teens still want what they've always wanted: to be loved and accepted while they discover who they are. As a corollary to this, Ms. Stepp assures parents that the role they play is still crucial even as it changes, that their relationship with their teens is all-important even as it transforms.We all know "it takes a village," but often we're not sure exactly what that means. At the end of each part of her book, Ms. Stepp lists several things "As Parents We Can..." do to encourage our teens in their growth and development, and involve other positive role models in their lives. These tips are distilled from the chapters that precede them, chapters that illustrate WHY it's important to act on this guidance."Our Last Best Shot" gracefully blends true-life stories with documented scientific research to give us a better understanding of all the influences at work in a teen's mind, from hormones to peer pressure. We get a detailed picture of the young teen that rivals all we know about infancy.The writing is clear, frank, and best of all, positive. We hear so much about the effects of divorce, teenage pregnancy, learning disabilities, overcrowded schools, alcohol and drugs, guns and violence, AIDS, and all the rest. It's refreshing to hear a sensible, rational voice that says, "Stop. Wait. Most teens are great kids, and we can help them become even better."