On the Up and Up: A Survival Guide for Women Living with Men on the Down Low

This book is the other version of Forbidden Love with a Married Man by Dennis Schleicher, which it is a 'must read' for all. His memoir is groundbreaking along with cutting edge, a first of its kind. Dennis fell victim just like Brenda Stone Browder. Schleicher's book will help women realize why their husbands cheat, and how it's out of their control.

Brenda's book is not sensational (as her husband J. L. King, On The Down Low). It is personal, reflective, cautious with a focus.

Last May I reviewed a great book titled On The Down Low by J.L. King. In this book, King gave insider information for women to use to help protect themselves from men who secretly have sex with other men. With the increase in African-American women contracting HIV, his book was on time for a much needed wake-up call. Yet, there was an area of the lifestyle that Mr. King could not fully reveal. This area is how the spouses or girlfriends of these men handle the situation when they discover their man's secret life. As I read On The Down Low, I continually thought, "This is a man who is telling the whole world he likes to have sex with other men, but he can't admit he's gay or bisexual." With this in mind, I wondered what his now ex-wife had truly gone through. ON THE UP AND UP by Brenda Stone Browder, J.L. King's ex-wife answered my questions about discovering your husband is heating on you with a man. As her words flowed from the page, I could feel her pain, anger, and betrayal; hear the voice telling her something was wrong; understand the self-doubt that somehow she was lacking; cheer when she realized that J.L.'s actions were is and had nothing to do with her; and rejoice when she found ove again... Along her journey, she pointed out signs to look or, the types of women these men seem to choose, and also included a survival guide for women living with men on the down low. Being so public about something so private couldn't have been easy for Mrs. Browder, but she's done an excellent job, and I'm sure ON THE UP AND UP will help thousands. Reviewed by Deatri King-Bey (...)

I think that Brenda Stone Browder's On the Up and Up is an excellent tool for any woman who feels that she is at a crossroads in her marriage, regardless of the reason. I found a lot of insight and wisdom from a woman who has "been there" and "done that". Mrs. Browder tells the story of her marriage to J.L. King, its disintegration and her own personal journey toward forgiveness honestly, but she maintains the dignity of her family in the process. While helpful advice is given for women who suspect men in their life of being homosexual, the book encourages women to listen to their intuition (the voice that women often drown out or ignore for fear of troubling relationship waters). I think that every woman who enters a serious relationship should read it.

Brenda Stone Browder is a Christian woman and lay minister, so while her book is not a salacious tale as some would like,it does offer insight as to how a spiritual person, one practicing her faith CHOSE to deal with the harsh hand dealt to her. I applaud her for her candor and strong conviction of faith, that brought her through a very difficult time in her life.