Nuclear Jellyfish: A Novel (Serge Storms)

Stripper: "This has gotten way too weird. You're no travel writer." Serge: "Yes I am." Stripper: "You're a psycho in a diaper." Serge: "I'm....multi-tasking." Lines like this were jumping off the pages making me laugh out loud throughout the entire book. Our favorite Florida-phile takes us on a hyper-speed tour of Florida while trying to sell his unique perspective of his beloved state to the travel companies. Of course the multi-tasker that Serge is, he is also tracks down a crew robbing diamond couriers, avoids the Feds, hooks up with a Florida trivia buff/stripper/tutor, and kills people who deserve it in creative ways. I'll never look at garden supplies the same way again. I enjoyed this book and would recommend it for anyone not overly sensitive.

While I was reading Nuclear Jellyfish, I had to get used to people giving me funny looks. I kept laughing out loud in public places. Not little chuckles or giggles, mind you, but throw-back-your-head, full-throated guffaws. The kind that make other people wonder if you've gone bonkers. Nuclear Jellyfish is a funny book and Tim Dorsey is a very funny writer. In reading reviews for his other books, I have noticed that there is a temptation, almost a compulsion on the part of reviewers to compare Tim Dorsey to Carl Hiassen. After all, both write humorous mystery stories set in Florida that skewer that state's legendary reputation for corruption of all sorts. I am here to tell you those comparisons are specious at best. So don't do it. Just really don't. Because any similarity ends with Florida. Because Tim Dorsey's humor is much more absurdist, more Monty Pythonesque, and for those who aren't prepared for it, harder to get into. Reading Tim Dorsey is like joining an madcap club, not everyone gets it. But those who get it, really get it. I like absurdist, over-the-top humor and Tim Dorsey makes me laugh out loud. Carl Hiassen writes good books, but he doesn't make me laugh out loud. Both writers should be encountered and assessed on their own merits. The main character in Tim Dorsey's series is Serge A. Storms, an ADD/OCD serial killer with an abiding love for Florida history and trivia, a powerful sense of justice, and an inventive flair for making miscreants pay for their bad behavior. Serge may seem like he can't pay attention to anything for long, but appearances in this case are deceiving. Serge is actually hyper-aware of everything going on around him and he doesn't miss a trick. The miscreants who run afoul of him in this book end up dead in very creative and ghoulish ways. Serge is an interesting character: an older literary brother to Dexter Morgan, another serial killer who delivers vengeance to those who have it coming. This idea of the fictional serial killer as an instrument of rough justice is an interesting literary phenomenon, indicative perhaps of a bubbling sense in our culture and society that the criminal justice system is no longer adequate to the task of meting out justice. Instead of the police and other righteous men and women serving as the means by which society has its vengeance, we are now obliged to use more perverse instrumentalities: like Serge, with his in-depth known of Home Depot and all the unexpected uses to which its wares can be put. In Nuclear Jellyfish, Serge and his drug-addled sidekick Coleman traverse Florida as Serge works on his internet-based travel advice site. Along the way, they run afoul of a robbery gang headed by a psychopath with a botched tattoo that resembles a jellyfish. Bad people end up dead in ghastly ways and Serge offers many useful travel tips. So, take a trip with Serge and Coleman, but be forewarned: your Home Depot may never look the same.

That's right, you heard me. I laughed out loud. That doesn't happen often to me when reading a book. So when it does, I take notice. And I didn't just laugh once. Not by a long shot. I laughed often, chuckled repeatedly, and smiled almost the entire way through. I have a new favorite author, and his name is Tim Dorsey. Tim Dorsey has managed to create the ultimate anti-hero in Serge A. Storms, the psychotic/obsessive/compulsive/homicidal/vengeful/chaotic force of nature that travels the lovely state of Florida with his completely useless and helpless junkie alcoholic sidekick, Coleman. When we first meet Serge and Coleman in the book, they are staking out a bridge, discussing Lynyrd Skynyrd, and wearing diapers in reverence of a lunatic astronaut. This alone should make you want to start reading. Serge has decided to launch his own Travel Guide Blog to Florida, featuring handy survival tips for the Floridian Tourist, such as how to tell where the criminals are sleeping by the way the cars are parked, and how to avoid Barracuda Hookers. This quest has him criss-crossing the Sunshine state in search of the iconic landmarks littering its landscape, many of them involving Lynyrd Skynyrd. Along the way, Serge and his Incompetent Compatriot pick up a hitchhiking exotic dancer on a mission of vengeance and tuition, stumble upon a band of diamond smuggling coin collectors, and go head to head with a blood-thirsty sociopath with a horribly botched glow-in-the-dark tattoo, all the while being chased down by a suspended detective perpetual stuck in a crime fiction noir novel, and a mysterious stranger who seems to know Serge's every move better then he knows himself. Still not interested? Despite all of this, Serge manages to periodically take time out to exact twisted justice on perceived predators of the everyday civilian in a myriad of inventively gruesome ways. Combining his love of Home Depot with his distaste for con-men, hustlers, predators and all-around villains, Serge exacts a MacGyver-like ingenuity with a diabolical mean streak that guarantees a high death-toll, and amusing assortment of severed limbs, and over a million hits on YouTube. What more could you want? Tim Dorsey manages to combine the madcap with the morose, and creates a Punisher meets The Three Stooges romp through Florida that is exciting, unpredictable, and laugh-out-loud hilarious. Trust me, just read the book already. You'll thank me.

Roger says: "I loved this book! Serge A Storms is back and more demented than ever. It's a rare book that is so funny you have to stop and laugh out loud, but Dorsey's novel is one of those rare books. I've read all the novels featuring Dorsey's seriously warped serial killer but someone new to the series could pick up Nuclear Jellyfish and still enjoy it as a stand alone book. Recommended. 5 stars. "

All right, here we go again! Number eleven and Serge and Coleman are still alive! [Not so sure about Coleman.] We're off the boat and once again traversing the Flori-duh sand spit. In a 1971 Javelin. [You gotta be kidding!] Rooting out the really bad guys. Thugs, so to speak. Led by the notorious Eel. [We all learn the connection between Eel and Nuclear Jellyfish.] We're focusing on the cheaper motels that host the smaller conventions and exhibitions and trade shows, such as coin collectors, and people, like Howard, who sell Flori-duh-iana. And who are transporting gems. Oh, and while Serge is trying to start and restart his travel service, unique in that it highlights important places where super- and megastars stayed and played, even momentarily, he is also dealing with Story. An English lit major, perchance a barracuda hooker, and a less-than-successful stripper who knows a whole lot of trivialities, sometimes even more than Serge! [No way!] Did I forget to tell you that Mahoney is out? And on Serge's trail? And about Johnny Vegas, the Accidental Virgin? And Sh-teve? Well, I guess you'll just need to find out about these folks all by yourselves. Is this a good ride? A frantic one, for sure. Some neat twists and turns but somewhat linear [even tho the center third of the book is a flashback. Or at least it was intended to be a flashback. Never mind...] Dorsey always intrigues when it comes to "offing" the bad guy. I'm not always certain his techniques work in "real life", so to speak. Like the butane lighter thing. Nevertheless, I think there should be a footnote, something like "Do not attempt this without professional or adult supervision." As with nearly all of Dorsey's madcap mayhem books, this is a fast read and a well-written tale. There are many, many plot jumps, but what the heck, it keeps the reader on his/her toes. Even Serge gets a little confused at times. [I mean, what is 6 weeks among friends, right?] And of course, Coleman is confused most of the time. Are there characters worth revisiting? I can't believe that Story has been written out. She represents Serge's alter-ego in many respects. Not so sure about Harold, tho. And looking back over the previous decade of books, I would sure like to have another visit with our legislators. And maybe even a governor. Then again, it's hard to find a Flori-duh equivalent of a mooseburger. And a visit to Dodgertown is just not enough for us baseball fans. Hey, Tim, remember that Babe Ruth played ball here. And Steinbrenner lives here. Oh. And one more thing. Early on, Serge tackled the media, but I think another visit is in order. Think Bubba the Love Sponge. Anyway, enough! Go out and buy the book! You may recognize an acquaintence, a neighbor, or even yourself. Hey, and if you're not in this book, maybe you'll make it in the next one! Five stars? You bet!