Narcissism: Denial of the True Self

I found this book to be excellent because it answered many questions about myself and my past behavior. I have a narcissistic personality and have often wondered why I acted out in such self-destructive ways. He explains how someone's behavior can reveal their true self. This is right on the mark. Everyone has a personality, which is revealed in their speech and their behavior. When someone's speech is different from their behavior, you know they are projecting a false image of their self. People who project false images of their self are naricisstic. Much of Dr. Alexander Lowan's research can be validated by the work done by the FBI's Behavior Science Unit, which was the basis for the popular movie "Silence of the Lambs." Once you've read Dr. Lowan's book, an excellent follow up book would be Journey Into Darkness by John Douglas, the FBI agent who started the FBI's Behaviorial Science Unit. I can truly say, Dr. Lowan's book saved my life and helped me change my behavior and find happiness with my self. This book is a must read for anyone who is in denial of their true self.

I just got divorced from living with a nacissist for 28 years-I finally feel like myself-I totally wore out this book...from reading-what an excellent insight into this personality disorder-he always seemed to turn it around to be me..Please read!

I am a wide reader in psychological literature--reading Freud, Reich, Jung etc. I noticed that one of the reviews suggested that Lowen's book is dated because modern psychiatry does not take the Oedipal/Electra complexes seriously. This is news to me. I found Lowen's book to be the best direct, no-nonsense description of the narcissistic personality I've read. He is not dated--and I hope this book goes into reprint someday.

Lowen's insights into the machinery of the self are enlightening, simple (but not obvious) and effective for creating personal change. His ability to sense and communicate the unions of the body and mind, and the emotional past and physical present is nothing short of genius. He talks about orgasm, so people think he is "too sexy" and he writes with out academic technical pretense so people think he's "common". And he is common. Common as air and water and as rare and refreshing as truly fresh air and clean water. I give this book to people that I care about and those that are ready to hear its wisdom, thank me.

Although another reviewer rated this book as a "1", I wonder whether we read the same book. We are, at least, very different readers. Perhaps for an academic, Lowen's discussion of narcissism might seem narrow. However, for the general reader, and especially for anyone who is fascinated (or tortured) by the paradox of self-destructive behavior, Lowen's analysis is revelatory. One does not have to accept BioEnergetic theory in general to conclude that Lowen has achieved some critical insights into the affliction known as "narcissism." Rather than the state of haughty self-absorption it is often made out to be, narcissism is in fact a form of slavery to a false image of the self. The theory that narcissism is actually a symptom of self-alienation, that can be relieved by bringing the sufferer back into contact with those portions of the self that he or she has banished, is most liberating. Lowen makes his points using understated, elegant prose that is more evocative of a collegial conversation than an argument. Highly recommended to anyone who has ever been baffled by behavior, whether of themselves or of a family member, reflecting a combination of gross insensitivity to others, intolerance of personal shortcomings, and a bewilderment at the seeming aridity of life itself. Lowen has gone a long way toward making sense of this suffering.