My Husband Is Gay: A Woman's Guide to Surviving the Crisis

I bought this book because my husband has decided he's gay. Because we first had a friendship many years ago, then we turned on the romance, we are surviving through this situation still living together, with our children. We are giving ourselves a time of transition to work it out. The kids are too young to hear the circumstances so they don't even suspect. But, I had so many questions in regards to how to handle this, not necessarily why is he gay. But, the book helped me to confirm that I definitely can't change his orientation, he and I had both thought for a moment, that it could be prayed out of him, but alas, no, and we are Christians and really love the Lord. Just hearing about other women's situations is a help in transcending your own troubles. You almost feel that you are sitting present listening to support groups talk about their challenges with the husband coming out. I feel that my husband and I have definitely taken the high road in transitioning to an eventual separation. We plan on staying very involved as a "family", and I hope is at some point in the distant future, to meet a man whom I can share a complete relationship with. My husband is an amazing person and father and I always want him in my life, in our children's lives. It hurts so much now to be working through this, the tears keep coming, my husband and I continue to have discussions about handling the future for our "family". Carol's book is very comforting, focuses on keeping you healthy, bringing you to a place of peace, as the straight spouse, as you work through your issues. There is no workbook, but I definitely was calmed and helped to keep on track to love my husband now as still a best friend, person, and father, and myself, too, so that life can move forward for me positively and healthfully. Her last section on steps to take to "get through this situation" are of peace and of love, which when acted out by anyone, in my heart I know, is the best way. I know my husband hurts because this incredible situation hurts me and will affect our "beautiful" family as it is. Carol helped me work through my anger. I'd sit down to read the book when feeling, mad, angry and confused, and stop reading at a point, then feeling hopeful, more at peace and brought back to a path of love and health for which to lead my actions for both myself and towards my husband, which of course is a definite benefit for our children, whom we adore above all. Her words to regard him as a valuable person, etc. were encouraging. All the best, this book will help you on your way, in a situation which of course is devastating to anyone.

nobody ever knows...until it happens. one day you come home and your husband is sitting at the kitchen table with his best cashmere sweater and his workout partner, Javier. next thing you know, he is telling you that his business trip to fire island wasnt for exactly company business. well, what can i say, this book helped me through those times and now i can say i am a proud survivor. my kids and i are adjusting, but it was all due to the book. it is good to know i am not the only one out there. i definitely recommend this book to anyone with a husband that prefers sausage to taco.

As Director of the Straight Spouse Network, having listened to the stories of thousands of spouses, I can say without hesitation that My Husband is Gay presents an accurate picture of the ups and downs of a wife's painful journey after her husband reveals he is [homosexual] or bisexual. Weaving her personal story along with those of many other womenn she interviewed, Carol Grever offers a broad spectrum of practical models for how to get through this crisis in one piece -- and also the possibilites of growth through the process.

This well written book is so helpful. In a unique and open style, Carol Grever shares her moving story and those of 25 other women. It reads like a novel and I did not want to put it down. It has a useful message to all people who have dealt with surprises, changes, and life tramas, not only those who find themselves impacted by a friend coming out of the closet. In openly communicating her struggles in such a heartful way, Carol makes it possible for others to also begin to talk about this previously forbidden topic. I highly recommend this book.

Carol Grever has written about being a straight spouse in a very caring and loving way. The book also approaches the subject honestly, without leaving the reader feeling without hope or encouragement. What a plus!