My Husband Betty: Love, Sex, and Life with a Crossdresser

I got this book to help me understand my need to crossdress and to help my wife understand why I do. The book was great from the wives view. It help me see through my wife eyes and I understand her frustrations. For me it was a book of great resources. I do now have a better understanding for my need to crossdress. So if you, wife/girlfriend or whomever need some answers read this.

?My Husband Betty? (?MHB?) by Helen Boyd is a remarkable book relating to a generally misunderstood, and also often fairly well-hidden, segment of our society: the world of heterosexual men who crossdress, and their female partners. The book is remarkable not only because it is one of the only books to address this group from the perspective of a wife of a crossdressing male, but because it is an extremely well-done melange of personal experience, shared experiences of others, as well as a survey of the available scientific and other literature available pertaining to this group. But the main virtue of MHB is that it is (at times brutally) honest about the significant challenges the author and other women have faced in the context of being in relationships with men who are crossdressers. In the end, it is this frank honesty, which some readers ? including ones who may be male crossdressers ? may find hard to swallow at times, that lends the book an enhanced degree of credibility, openness and accessibility to anyone interested in this area, and particularly to those who are living this experience. The book begins with an examination of the crossdressers themselves, including the different kinds of things that they do, the different ?types? of crossdressing men, the different phases of crossdressing that a crossdresser may experience at different points of his life. This chapter of the book is enlightening for crossdressers themselves, but is invaluable for a partner of a crossdresser who is at square one. An extremely helpful appendix contains a glossary of crossdressing and related acronyms and jargon. Next the book addresses the women who are the partners of crossdressers, taking into account the various experiences that they have had, their reactions to their partner?s crossdressing ways, the negative or at best conflicted feelings most of them experience, as well as the diversity of viewpoints among them as to how they relate to their crossdressing partner and his crossdressing. This is one of the primary chapters where the author?s own experiences, and her willingness and honesty in describing them, lend the book a remarkable depth and credibility. As the author notes, she is not trying to put a pretty face on crossdressing, but to address it squarely and honestly, and her admission of her own continuing challenges, fears and difficulties relating to her husband?s crossdressing is both illuminating and touching, and should be required reading for any crossdressing man who is, has been, or intends to be in a relationship with a woman. The chapter which follows ? addressing the various modes of relationships between crossdressing men and their female partners ? is told through the experiences of six different couples, each of which has come to their own way of managing the experience in a different way, and helps to move the experiential part of the book beyond the author?s own experiences to reflect those of a broader group. A cha

This is an honest and intense account of what it is like to be married to a crossdresser. Helen Boyd's acceptance and openness, while at the same time acknowledging her own feelings of trepidation concerning some aspects of this new life, is remarkable and admirable. There are no cross-dressers in my life, (that I am aware of) and I still found this book to be very worthwhile for the honest approach and thorough investigation of the subject.

As a crossdresser for nearly 3 decades and someone who is married, this book gave me tremendous insights into the challenges that are faced by my spouse. Helen Boyd does a very thorough analysis of identifying the choices and tensions inherent in being a CD as well as the struggles a spouse must face. What I found especially enlightening was the description of the continuum of dressing and the various types of relationships crossdressers have with their significant others. I highly recommend the section that deals with the real questions that should be discussed in a relationship. There is an enormous struggle that goes on in these kinds of relationships and most don't last. The book offers one useful roadmap.

Helen Boyd not only opened my mind and heart to the experiences and realities of an under- and mis-represented people, she did so with clarity , brevity and wit. A thoroughly engaging book it is a must-read for anyone either integrated in or tangentially affected by gender issues of any and all kinds. Thank you, Ms. Boyd, for creating this much needed volume and for researching your subject matter so completely and objectively.

There have always been crossdressers and other transgendered people, but there has not been such a brilliant examination of the subject since Magnus Hirschfeld himself (to whom this book is dedicated) coined the word "transvestite." Whether you are one, you know one, or you are merely fascinated with the subjects of human sexuality and relationships, this is a must-read. This book, with its intimate portraits of people and relationships, has scholarly depth and page-turner readability. Helen Boyd has produced a masterpiece of cultural anthropology, gender studies and sexuality which will be a classic.