Living with a Brother or Sister with Special Needs: A Book for Sibs

...for this fund of invaluable information. I highly recommend this book along with Meyer's other stellar gem, "Views From Our Shoes," which addresses the needs siblings of people with special needs have. This book lends the voice of hope, confidence and clarity to the experiences many people whose siblings with special needs have. It not only sheds light on many questions that often crop up, it also provides a safe forum to explore any and all sibling related issues. I like the way Meyer respects his readers' intelligence. It is so critical, in fact paramount for people to be informed about the special needs their siblings have. That is a good way to foster honest relationships and inclusion within the family. That also promotes acceptance of the members who have special needs. Meyer's book serves as a medical, legal and educational advocate. It provides much needed information about services in these areas. I especially liked the part where people are strongly encouraged and rightfully so to make provisions for their children with special needs and to keep the other children without special needs informed of these decisions. People with special needs are vital members of their respective families and each person impacts upon the lives of others. That is still another reason why it is so crucial to have frank, open discussions with all the family members so as to keep the lines of communication open and to prevent secrets and fear. The fear of the unknown and the lack of communication causes problems and helps no one. I wish this book had existed a generation ago! I can't recommend it highly enough and it is a book for everybody, parents; all children; educators; medical professionals and the world at large. I love this book!

I am a Japanese and I am a "sibling."I encountered this book and Don Meyer's Sibling Support Project in October of 1997. At that time, I was struggling to persuade the staff of a (sibling) group that support for siblings was as important as support for people with special needs. In my view this book gave me confidence and shed light on my road to start a new sibling support group. Some uncommon feelings, opportunities and concerns that siblings might have are described in Chapter 1. Medical knowledge of various disabilities are written about in Chapters 2-6. Since siblings are not often informed about their siblings' disabilities by anyone, it could cause more concern; this book's objective is very important. You can also get basic knowledge of laws, programs, and services for persons with disabilities and their families in the U.S., in Chapter 7. In Chapter 8, an uncommon concern is discussed: where will my sister (brother) live when she (he) grows up. The authors continues by stressing the fact that parents should tell their plans for their disabled children to their "normal" children, and offers suggestions for doing this. Since this book is intended for young siblings, it is easy for me to read it as a foreigner. Reading Chapter 1, tears welled up in my eyes. I could relate to many things: friends, unselfishness, accepting differences, guilt, overinvolvement, understanding, embarrassment, loss, maturity, worry and loneliness. I wish I could have read it in Japanese when I was a child ! I strongly recommend young and adult siblings, parents and service providers to read this book all over the world, because siblings need peer support and information in a straightforward manner.