Living a Life That Matters: Resolving the Conflict Between Conscience and Success

Enjoyed the taped version of LIVING A LIFE THAT MATTERS by Harold S. Kushner, a rabbi . . . but the author's occupation shouldn't deter anybody from reading this thought-provoking little book that according to the subtitle, will help you in RESOLVING THE CONFLICT BETWEEN CONSCIENCE AND SUCCESS. Kushner, also the author of WHEN BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE (one of my all-time favorites), skillfully blends examples from the Bible, movies and literature into this effort that got me thinking about the significance of my life. He gave lots of useful suggestions, too . . . such as this one, in particular: if you ever had a teacher who made a difference in your life, drop that person a note to that effect . . . you'll be amazed at how rarely that is done and, also, how positive the impact will be. I also liked the following passages: Most people are not afraid of ding; they're afraid of not having lived. Goodness and love show us that we've got it [life] together. People die, but love does not die. It is recycled from one life to another. According to the Bible, a good person--even if dead--is still alive.

Few authors writing today offer the kind of comfort that Harold Kushner does. In all of his books, including his latest "Living a Life that Matters," he deals with the big issues in life, and does it in a simple writing style that manages to be both profound and soothing.Like his readers, Kushner lives in a dual world: a world of commerce and competition, and a world where he desires to be a good person, and feels guilt when he isn't. How does a person integrate these two worlds? As in his other books, Kushner draws on biblical stories that illustrate the universal and timeless nature of this conflict. In Genesis, Jacob is a character at first wily and ambitious (he steals his brother's birthright, among other things) but also a character who has the famous wrestle with an angel. Kushner sees this image as being a perfect symbol of man's struggle with his dual nature. Throughout the book he returns to his struggle of duality, which he believes is inherant to human nature. We all desire to be good, while needing our competitive side to survive in this world. Kushner encourages that balance between the two is key to living a life that matters.With that resolved, Kushner delves into why life has meaning in spite of our nature. He believes, as do many religious people, that every life has value to God, and even the smallest decisions we make can affect others' lives for the good. There is a nice sentiment to his spirituality, and he is gifted at handling broad topics with grace --he references sources as diverse as the Old Testement, the movie "Witness," and the Jeckyll and Hyde story to illustrate his points, and does it without seeming heavy handed or moralizing. Somehow religion makes sense when Kushner explains it -- even something as baffling as eating kosher makes perfect sense when he is done explaining it.I've enjoyed all of Rabbi Kushner's books. This one is on par with the rest -- graceful, moving and impactful.

In my years of ministry, I have held the hand of many dying persons. And you know what? Never has one said "I wish I had spent more time at work", or "My life would have been complete if I had got that promotion." Nope. They talk about words of love unsaid, words of anger they wish they could unsay, time that should have been spent with their kids and family that they wasted on chasing an ephemeral ideal of 'success'. In Living a Life that Matters, Kushner has given us a timely examination of why it is that so many in our culture spend their valuable time striving for a culturally defined success that doesn't really matter, and how to reevaluate and reorient for a meaningful life. Kushner's wonderful stories and examples, as well as clear entertaining writing make this a gem. It's easy to read, and as deep as the night sky.If you are a person with an unsettled feeling in your soul, wondering what your life really means after all, Kushner's book is a great place to start looking for answers.

Living a life that matters can be easily translated into living a life of love and compassion for one's fellow man. As a result of the terrible tragedy in New York City on September 11th, there are many people searching for answers to life's meaning, and asking why...why this senseless tragegy? The unexplained mysteries of life, however tragic, are often attributed to the fact that the universe is unfolding as fate intended and that all things happen for a reason. Somtimes, it is very difficult to find "good reason" in such a time of horror. Tragedy has a way of bringing people together in time of need, and hopefully from that we find strength, understanding and love for humanity. Through all of this we struggle to find spiritual and emotional peace within ourselves and while "Living a Life That Matters" does not have all the answers, it is a book which instills goodness, understanding and compassion within us. The book helps us to see that revenge and quest for power are destructive, that material gain is really very insignificant in life's overall plan, and that love, kindness, compassion and personal strength enrich our lives a thousand times over. Each and every person we reach out to touch leaves a mark on the world and in our hearts.Harold S. Kushner has written a book that causes the reader to look deep within themselves and decide for themselves just what kind of person they truly want to be. Chapter eight was my favourite part of the book as it points out the influence we have on others. Each and every chapter reveals an important message to us so that we may do our part in making the world a better place and, by doing so, finding solice and peace within ourselves.

Rabbi Kushner has woven a fascinating series of essays together to establish a new way to think about the meaningfulness of your life choices. Spiritually, he finds many people torn between the desire to achieve significance and the call of the consciences. Like the young Jacob, some will obtain their desires by cutting corners that offend their consciences. Drawing on his many years as a rabbi, he shares what he has learned at many death beds. Few people are concerned about dying. Those who have done good things in their lives are almost always at peace. Those who regret the timing of their deaths wish for a little more time, so that they might yet leave some marks of goodness behind them. From that perspective, he gently points out that we can achieve both the significance and the clear conscience that we crave by focusing our attention on have positive influences on others in supporting roles as family member, friend, and occasional helping hand to strangers. The move, It's a Wonderful Life, is used as an example. The Jimmy Stewart character doesn't realize how all the little things he did affected so many lives, which in turn affected so many other lives. We, too, tend to be blind to the potential influence we have.The book has a kindness and gentleness that make its message welcome and warming. "I believe in you. I believe that you have the ability to do great things, things that will change the world for the better." I share that belief and am delighted that Rabbi Kushner has written this book. In chapter one, the subject is the two voices of God. This essay considers the models of competition with others and our heart-felt desire to share compassion, and how the two often operate at odds with one another in young people. He ascribes the competition to a desire for significance, that many psychologists would echo as a deep human need.In chapter two, the story of Jacob's transformation from trickster to being firmly founded in God's will is featured. I especially liked the way that the pain of winning by trickery and being tricked in turn by Laban probably affected how Jacob felt about himself.In chapter three, you are encouraged to decide what kind of person you want to be. Rather than ask all to seek perfection in sainthood, he argues for a mixture of human competitiveness and compassion that allows us to strive and to care. This chapter includes interesting references to Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and an episode of the original Star Trek series in which Kirk is divided into a good and a bad version by a transporter problem. In chapter four, there is an interesting discussion of the psychological impacts of justice from the point of view of those who are harmed. The experience of South Africa's Truth and Reconciliation Commission is recounted along with a new type of trial in the United States where attempts are made to improve how the victims and their families feel. In chapter five, you will learn about how wholeness