Lessons for Dylan: From Father to Son

There are no athiests in foxholes or in an oncologist's office. Siegel, an entertainment critic for ABC's GMA, faced a terminal illness, and created this story of his first 58 years of life. (He passed away on June 29, 2007 at the age of 63). At the age of 54, Siegel became a father for the first time and learned that he had cancer. In "Lessons for Dylan," Siegel shares all the things he wants his son to know, in case he is not around to tell him, things about his family history and Jewish heritage, life's pleasures and disappointments, the challenges of growing up (at any age), and, most important, who his father is and what Joel values. As Joel and Rabbi Larry Rafael discussed, Joel wants his son to be normal (but not average). Siegel was born in East Los Angeles in 1943. His Romanian Jewish grandmother survived the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire in March 1911. (Her father banned her from going that day.) His father, a Levite, was an electrician, and he got the first African American and the first Mexican American into his local IBEW union. In 1965, Joel delivered a bag containing $800 in cash to a minister named Martin Luther King at a UCLA luncheon. ("Dr. King, I've come with dessert.") He ended up spending the Summer working for King. Siegel says he invented the names of several Baskin Robbins flavors, including German Chocolate Cake (my favorite) and Pralines and Cream. Siegel was nominated for a Tony Award for his work on a musical about Jackie Robinson. Siegel was a joke writer Senator Robert F. Kennedy in 1968, and witnessed Kennedy's assassination in the Ambassador Hotel in Los Angeles. He is co-founder (with Gene Wilder) and president of Gilda's Club, a non-profit support facility for cancer patients. Only Siegel can make the story of his chemo sessions and a colostomy funny. Siegel candidly writes about the end of his marriage (his third) to Dylan's mother and the experience of having cancer. The famous ad man and partier Jerry Della Femina bought pot for Siegel during his chemotherapy. Siegel also shares great stories from show biz (featuring Orson Welles, Marlene Dietrich, Paul Newman, Brad Pitt, Stevie Wonder, all four Beatles, and more); lays out the History of the Jewish People in Four Jokes ("Why make trouble?"); and offers fatherly advice on sex ("ask your mother"), work, what to cook for Rosh Hashanah (recipes included), and a list of movies he would like to see with his son. One of his letters: Dear Dylan, One day you might remember--maybe triggered by a photograph, or a sense memory of a texture or a color--the soft, grey cashmere sweater I bought for you for your second birthday. As an adult you may wonder, "What kind of schmuck buys a cashmere sweater for a two year-old boy?" The answer is: A schmuck who tempts fate.

You probably know Joel Siegel from his enthusiastic movie reviews on Good Morning America. But do you know the rest of the story? Here's a chance to find out. Mr. Siegel became a father for the first time at age 54, and his son, Dylan, was born on the day Mr. Siegel finished chemotherapy for colorectal cancer. That cancer later spread to his lungs, and two more cancer surgeries and treatments followed. Mr. Siegel's marriage did not last, but his love for Dylan did. Realizing that his chances of living to see Dylan grow up are limited, Mr. Siegel decided to write down all of the wonderful things he wanted to share with Dylan over the next few decades . . . but might not be able to. The result is a touching memoir with a heart that will cause you to shed more than an occasional tear while appreciating Mr. Siegel's love for his son. Mr. Siegel writes well, has had many interesting experiences, and retains his sense of wonder. He is open about many of his faults (which have led to failed marriages), but remains cautiously optimistic . . . and careful. Dedicating the material to his son makes the memoir more personal and meaningful than almost any other memoir that I have read. Anyone with an open heart would enjoy and benefit from this book. If you are like me, you expected to mainly hear about the movies . . . and you will. But there's much more in the book about Mr. Siegel's family, Jewish heritage (there's even a Yiddish dictionary with hilarious definitions), illnesses, past marriages, and advice for Dylan. The show business stories are almost all ones that I had not heard before, and will reward those who are primarily looking for this feature. Although you might think these are only about the movies, he also was a music critic and got to know the Beatles in the early days. I was particularly interested by Mr. Siegel's first-hand accounts of working for civil rights in the South, helping with Bobbie Kennedy's campaign, and how he helped his wife, Jane, with her fatal illness. One of the thoughts you will have as you read this book is how you would write a parallel one for either your children or your grandchildren to play the same role in sharing knowledge and love across the generations. I hope you will read this book and feel inspired to either transmit your own lessons in your own way . . . or to create the book you want to share with your descendants. In any case, keep a hanky handy!

I've trusted Joel Siegel's movie picks since he joined the ABC New York affiliate in 1976, and 99% of the time he's been right. I borrowed his memoir from the library and enjoyed it so much I bought a copy to reference again and again. This book has it all: Love Stories. History Lessons. Comedy. Tragedy. Celebrity Gossip. Career Tips. Recipes. A Glossary of Yiddish Expressions. Siegel fought for civil rights, met the Beatles, rubbed elbows with Hollywood glitterati, battled cancer and lived to tell his tale. What started as a legacy for his young son is a legacy for us all. With wit, humor, and brutal honesty, Seigel reminds us what it's all about: Family. Love. Chicken Soup. Pair it up with All I Need to Know I Learned In Kindergarten and you have the blueprints for a happy, full, rich life.Another great read on the importance of family and personal success: Use What You've Got & Other Lessons I Learned from My Mom by Barbara Corcoran

A look at Joel's amazing life and the unconditional love from a father to his son. Anyone who's had a cancer experience in their life will find themselves in the pages of this book. It will make you laugh and cry out loud.

A terrific book that reminds you of what is most important in life - love and laughter! I laughed and cried and picked up a whole lot of "trivia pursuit-like" knowledge along the way.