The Coming of Age

Simone de Beauvoir places the subject quote, from the "searcher for lost time, himself," Marcel Proust, most fittingly, at the beginning of this seminal work. De Beauvoir was one of the most outstanding French intellectuals of the 20th Century, famous for her novels, "The Mandarins," and "She Came to Stay", as well as one of the longest autobiographies ever, a total of four volumes. She was also, for better or worse, the lifetime companion of Jean-Paul Sartre. Rare is the person who writes one seminal (double-entendres are not intentional, and would hopefully be forgiven) work on a field, and she is most famous for "The Second Sex," originally published in 1949, an extraordinary examination of the role of women in the world's society; a work which was a precursor to the feminist movements in the `60's. Rarer still is the person who can write two seminal works, and despite the fact it never has gained as much "traction" with the reading public, I consider "The Coming of Age," published in 1970, when De Beauvoir was just over 60, to be the equal of "The Second Sex" in terms of its comprehensive, and original examination of a subject that society, as well as many individuals, prefer to, well, as Proust said, retain as an abstract notion. Speaking of an abstract notion, I first read this work when I was under 30, in part since that is what I did; work with the elderly. I decided to re-read it now, since it is far less abstract, being around the age De Beauvoir was when the book was published. It has lost none of its power; now I understand, and have read more of her references. In the introduction De Beauvoir says that she intends to "break the conspiracy of silence" on what she has been told is a "dismal subject." And indeed she does. As she did in "The Second Sex," she used her phenomenal erudition to cover how old age is perceived in different societies, for example, the Koryak, a northern Siberian people. She also examines the historical record of how societies dealt with aging, from the ancient Greek, Chinese and Jewish societies. Her observation about the power of the elderly in these societies remains fresh. Consider: "Sometimes they had real power, sometime they played the part that, in certain mathematical operations, is played by imaginary numbers-they are necessary for the working out of the problem, but once the answer has been reached, they are eliminated." Concerning the present day, she notes the seeming paradox of how society shuffles the handicapped and the orphans to the sidelines, not to be thought of much, but the same is done to the elderly, though that is the most likely fate for all of us, unlike the other sub-categories. From her voluminous reading she relates the experiences of numerous individuals to aging, and I found the trials and tribulations of Juliette Drouet, who tolerated the infidelities of Victor Hugo, as well as Sophia Tolstoy, who experienced the same with her husband, illuminating. There is melancholy, and

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are old people real people? that is de Beauvoir's question.When I first read this book 30 years ago, I thought it was so great I assigned it to my students in a course on gerontology. Now that I am older than the author was when she wrote it, I realize how little she really knew about old people. de Beauvoir is not a sociologist or a gerontologist, but a professor of philosophy and leftist French writer. She (and her partner Jean Paul Sartre) often took official positions on certain topics as a matter of principle, but with little understanding coming from the heart. She has a clear philosopher's gaze and is utterly pitiless. She doesn't cut people any slack. Her great contribution here is that she brings a wider attention to what it's like being old in terms of how societies conceptualize old age and in terms of old age as a subjective experience by quoting from the lives and works of famous authors and artists who lived to a ripe old age, defined as anything over 60! How times have changed. Currently the average life expectancy in the US is over 75! (It's over 83 in Kansas). I now live in a town of 15000 whose founding mayor was elected over the age of 80 (he died in office, suddenly, at 86 in the middle of a development planning project). Many of my neighbors are pushing 90 or 100 (and over) and keep active walking for miles and swimming for hours daily. Are they real people? You bet! Are some of my neighbors with canes, walkers, hearing aids, cataract surgery and nurse's aides or companions real people? You bet! The amazing thing about old age is people just want to keep on doing what they are used to doing for as long as they can. Many of the peculiarities of age that de Beauvoir describes are now known to be due to physical medical problems which are treatable. However, her work is still valid for those last few weeks or months of severe impairment before death. You just won't feel good after reading this book.

I read this book by when my grandmother was living her last days in a nursing home. There was so much I didn't know about older people -- what is important to them, how they think, what their needs are, how they approach death. Simone de Beauvoir, the celebrated French thinker and writer offers an in-depth study of older people as individuals and older people in society. She also looks at the treatment and psychology of older people across time in western civilization. Anyone who is a caretaker of an older family member or friend, or cares about understanding older people will find this book remarkable and thoughtful.