In the Wake of Suicide: Stories of the People Left Behind

Just as her book - Words I Never Thought To Speak, this book is very good both for the "survivors" of suicide (those left behind) and even for those contemplating suicide. For the survivors, Victoria Alexander really shows that although someone in your life chose to end their life, life still goes on for you and many many many people have been forced to find a way to go on, incorporating the guilt, grief and what-ifs into their lives. For those contemplating suicide, these life histories of people left behind show that no matter what you do (affairs in order, letters of explanation etc), no matter what you believe (it won't matter; they'll get over it; they'll be sorry; it's for the best) there's always a domino effect. Many people get hurt - some you never knew..the newspaper boy who wonders if he'd said hello to you a few mornings ago if it'd made a difference; the emergency responder who is haunted by the resemblance you had to someone in their life; the co-worker you rode in the elevator with but never talked to;..there's always someone. Today may be bad, tomorrow too - but you never know how things may change in two months; two years; five years. There are so many other options. Suicide doesn't end just your life - it alters the future of everyone around you, many times irreparably.

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Of all the many books on suicide I've read through the years, this book rates highest on my list of books that are helpful in terms of the understanding it provides to survivors of suicide, including both the legacy and the different ways we process and come to terms with a suicide. What I spent years trying to understand in myself, my family members, and other suicide survivors, I found on the pages of this well-written and organized book. Time and again while reading, I would say aloud with some excitement: "That's WHY!" or "Exactly!" or "I wish I'd written that!" In addition, I couldn't resist sharing some of the passages and/or the insights I'd gained to others who were either struggling with the legacy suicide leaves behind or were contemplating suicide themselves. This book clearly shows that suicide leaves its own distinct fingerprints on the hearts and lives of its survivors. I wish I'd discovered the book long ago. Kudos to Victoria Alexander!

An excellent read for health care professionals, survivors of suicide and anyone seeking stories of human strength, Victoria Alexander offers a well organized collection of narratives from survivors of suicide. Raw in it's honesty, it offers hope of a future to the recently bereaved and a reference point for professionals and laypeople caring for those left behind. A survivor myself, it allowed me to address issues I had burried years earlier. A decade of collecting these touching, sometimes painful stories has allowed insight into a suffering that shame so often causes us to conceal.

Victoria Alexander brings her own experiences in life into this book that describes the isolation, confusion, desperation, anger, lack thereof of any emotion...once someone close to you takes their own life. For once I have found a book that is not purely engorged in its academic statistics. I applaud Ms. Alexander for seeing the truth of the terror. I am a survivor of suicide, and this book proves a great comfort in knowing that I am not the only one. I pray that we rid ourselves of the stigma. Interviews in this volume range from every corner of the nation, be it a son, wife, husband, daughter, mother, father, or anyone close who has died by their own hand.Thank you Ms. Alexander.Molly Leach Boise, ID