In the Garden of Our Dreams: Memoirs of Our Marriage

I enjoyed this book immensely. I previously believed that the Taylor/Haizlip story was somewhat snobby, with two daughters who went to Yale, and the big beautiful houses they lived in, yadda yadda yadda, but in reading this book, I realized that this was not the case. They have struggled and perservered. I especially enjoyed Harold's story and "getting to know him". I sort of knew Shirlee's story since I read The Sweeter the Juice, and it was really nice to read of how they fell in love, and most importantly, how they've remained in love along with their other trials and tribulations. This book definitely has it all. I was pleased to actually have something that I actually wanted to read on the train to and from work. I also must say that the segments outlining Shirlee's driving adventures had me laughing out loud, too! I highly recommend this book, and wish it didn't end.

I work at a women's organization where Shirlee Taylor-Haizlip is Scholarship Chairman, and I can say from personal experience that the Haizlips are not "kidding" anybody. The joke is on one of the previous reviewers, who discerned "interracial" from 306 pages of wit, candor and history. The Haizlips are as inspirational as their novel. They are gracious, genuine and clearly devoted to one another.I related to many aspects of their story, but also learned from its historical context. Above all, I simply enjoyed it. I laughed, and nearly cried, out loud. Read the book and you will want to share it. And, know that somewhere in Los Angeles, a garden really does flourish.

The Haizlips have written a lyrical memoir of their forty year marriage, demonstrating over and over that love and commitment are the foundation of a lasting relationship. Despite the challenges that they encountered, this steadfast foundation never waivered. The previous reviewer somehow missed the most poignant message of their story. Racism is the ever present snake in the garden. As recounted in Shirlee's first book, The Sweeter the Juice, the issue of color and race in America is a powerful destroyer of families. However, Shirlee and Harold have managed not to succomb to the bitterness that bigotry and hatred can breed, but have built a life together and contributed to the greater good of sociey, reflecting their love for each other. I was awed by their story and felt priveleged to read it. My life is richer for having read this work, but even more so for having had the pleasure of calling them my friends.

I enjoyed Shirlee Taylor Haizlip's first book, "The Sweeter the Juice," so much I could not wait to read "In the Garden of Our Dreams." I chose it as the number one book on my summer reading list. I was not disappointed. I could hardly put it down. My family teased me because I was so enthralled with the book I tried to stand at the stove and cook and read it simultaneously. Needless to say their meals suffered somewhat. I thoroughly enjoyed this book because it showed a couple really committed to their marriage vows. They loved and supported each other through thick and thin, good times and bad times. Harold has stayed in love with his wife for forty years and has always remained faithful to her. Shirlee kept loving her husband and believing in him even when his jobs did not always work out. She always thought about what was best for her husband and the children when she made decisions. I enjoyed seeing their commitment to each other. They did not paint themselves as perfect to the reader either. They honestly admitted their faults and shortcomings. They had their share of problems with job changes, raising their daughters, dealing with their extended family, and having to deal with racism. But I admired how Shirlee and Harold could communiate with each other and talk things through. Harold seemed to really listen to his wife and respect her opinion. Being the daughter of a prominent Baptist minister, Shirlee relied on her faith throughout the years to to get her through the hard times. It was a good lesson for me to see her strength and grace in facing challenges. It did not matter to me that they were well educated, were upper middle class, and were part of the so-called "black bourgeois." What really captivated me was the committed love they had for each other, their family and friends. I will cherish this book and let it serve as an inspiration and guide to me in my marriage.

When I first heard about this book I was skeptical. What on earth could these two people - two black people - tell me about marriage. The book offered no titilating sex and no violence. It was all about love. Loving yourself, your spouse, your family and life. The Haizlips have had an incredible life together. Charmed may be a better word to describe their marriage. What I liked most about the book was the message: life is what you make it. I found myself rethinking about a lot of times when I have complained about little things; not appreciated people I loved, and have been afraid to take risks. As we all know, love and marriage are risky, but it was such a pleasure to read about a couple who willingly dived right in and showed me just what a marriage could and should be.