In the Country of Illness: Comfort and Advice for the Journey

I couldn't put this book down. For a few successive nights, it brought me back to the time I shared with a beloved sister as caregivers, faithful visitors, and advocates for my Dad over the course of the year it took for him to die of stomach cancer. The author hits all the right notes when he writes of caregiver behavior and coping strategies, even humor. The theme of placating and seeking favors from every functionary along the way in Malady rings ever so true. No scheme or pretense is too low when the well-being of a loved one is at stake. I recommend it for anyone about to ride shotgun on the journey through Malady.

After hearing Lipsyte on NPR and as a recent emigrant into the country of Malady myself, I couldn't not read and now recommend this book. I laughed and cried with Mr. Lipsyte as he talked about his travels to Malady (the land of sickness)because I was able to identify with most of his experiences. Like his ex-wife, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Regardless of the prognosis, I truly believe that it is impossible to remain unscathed by the diagnosis of cancer or any other chronic or terminal condition. Like all of us travelers, Mr. Lipsyte has his own souveniers of his journey and he shares them with humor and sorrow, the two sides of the coin of malady. I laughed with him as he shared stories from the tumor ward and I cried with him as breast cancer consumed Margie. This book is important for anyone who is experiencing a longterm or chronic disease him/herself but it is equally important for the caregivers to appreciate fully their role in the disease paradigm.

I couldn't put this down. He made his time, and his ex-wife's times with cancer so vivid -- the doctors, the feelings, his relations with his family, the wild dark humor. He sounded like a really compassionate man to me -- clear-eyed and telling things straight, not pretending. I went through cancer treatment recently -- chemo, surgery, radiation -- so maybe that's partly why it was so fascinating for me. But I really could have used this book when I was going through all that -- and now, 3 years later, I could really get into his story and especially that crazy, dark tumor humor, the stuff that gets you through those chemo sessions.

This book is badly written and focuses entirely on the author, even when talking about the illness of others. Lipsyte's ego gets in the way of every yarn. I read a rave review in the Times, so I bought it. So much for the Times raves about their own employees.