If the Buddha Married: Creating Enduring Relationships on a Spiritual Path

When my wife and I get stressed out in our relationship, we sit down and one of us reads about a page out loud from "If the Buddha Married", then we talk about it, and about our own communication problems. This book reduces our defensiveness, and opens the door for us to level with each other about our own communication glitches, and makes it easier to let each other know what is bothering us about the other's communication style. I'd recommend it to any couple.

I picked up this book when my husband and I were having difficulties in our second year. We were missing many of the ideas in this book, particularly being mindful of each other's and our own needs. This book helped us get back on track and we saved our marriage. Two years later, we are much stronger than before and have a beautiful son too. It is a good book for us to keep handy too for the occasional refresher. Other critiques are correct. There is not much serious Buddhist philosophy and it doesn't mention Buddha's family life, but the lessons are very helpful nonetheless.

I really enjoyed this book and gave it to friends after I finished reading it the third time. Some of it is just common sense, but it has a very entertaining format and pearls of wisdom from many different philosopies. Not based on any one religion (despite the title) it is a good read for anyone interested in improving their relationship, starting a new one, or healing from the last one.

This doesn't really seem to be about Buddhism, but it is fabulous. My fiance and I read this book to each other almost every day. A few pages at a time, a small chapter: as we turn each page and read each word, this book speaks to us, unfolding the mysteries of being in a relationship. The book speaks often to the couple of getting into the "us place:" my advice is that you begin by reading the book together, and my belief is that, with this book, you will get there.(To Charlotte: Thanks!)

Although, I do not know a lot about Buddhism (historic details as some of the other reviewers do), I can say I found the book an excellent, inviting and uplifting read. It impacted my relationship in a profound way. I think partly because it was not "clinical" nor written in an analytical style. The flow and read of the book was so wonderful, it brought down my defense mechanisms and made me consider what was most important. Each chapter deserves real think time -- and you may wish to read it together as a couple. Maybe a chapter each night before you go to bed. It is a book of great enlightenment. It's what you do with it that counts. Several chapters struck a chord so deep, it moved me into a whole new realm. I can not give this book enough stars. I recommend it to all who are in a relationship and are striving to stay together over the long haul. You can spend a couple of bucks now, or a whole bunch later on therapy, post divorce.