Does the opening "pling pling plinggg" of Bette Midler's "The Rose" fill you with existential dread? Do you cringe at the mere whiff of what Phil Collins is spewing "In the Air Tonight"? Have you ever bolted from a restaurant because Celine Dion's cover of "All By Myself" was threatening to drive you over the edge? Well, turn around, bright eyes, because Tom Reynolds is here with I Hate Myself and Want to Die , a laugh-out-loud-'til-you're-sobbing...