Homo Domesticus: Notes from a Same-Sex Marriage

Homo Domesticus is an intelligently written book that humorously describes an unconventional marriage and gives valuable relationship advice without pointing fingers. David Valdes Greenwood does not feed on the heated argument on the morality of gay marriage; he portrays his own marriage and shares the insights he achieved throughout his life and relationship with a great sense of humor and compassion. Both, heterosexual as well as homosexual people will recognize themselves throughout the course of the book because relationships, no matter what gender-mix they consist of, always follow the same patterns and experience the same difficulties. Whether Homo Domesticus is consulted for relationship advice or read for entertainment, a great time, a recurring smile and a lot of insight are guarantied.

David is a graduate student, representing the college's gay student group at a student orientation fair. Amid the primarily younger undergrad crowd, he spots Jason, a cute, bohemian-type type in his mid 20's and ... as the saying goes ... he knew he was in love. But before you automatically close the scene with slow-motion montages and a choir singing "And they lived happily ever after," read the rest of David's touching, whimsical and refreshingly honest account of his sometimes-rocky relationship with Jason, through their church commitment ceremony (with a dash home to retrieve a missing pair of pants), the reaction of their respective in-laws, to their first drafty apartment together, househunting snafus, a "7 year itch" that threatended to end their relationship, trying to decide (after their state of Massachusetts approved them) whether to actually marry, and the decision to adopt a child. The author's open and intimate tone makes you feel that you know the couple personally, and share their pains as well as celebrate their achievements. From being openly gay (but being smart enough to avoid people who, in the author's words, would view "the story of Sodom and Gomorraharah as having a happy ending"), and David's "crashing" of a local mothers' group to get child-rearing tips, to the "scary parts" of the film "March of the Penguins" causing them to cut their only night-out short, and rush home to their infant daughter, David and Jason become your favorite couple to know. Especially recommended for young couples, but will be loved by just about anyone. Five stars out of five.

David's wonderful book charts the ups and downs of two men who build a life together, marry, buy a house and adopt a child in a predominantly straight and often prejudiced world. They are romantically mismatched which sometimes leads to some humorous moments. However, like most relationships they experience difficult times but their love for each other brings them through it. Their story is often told in a very witty style and many moments seem heartwarming. The book depicts an un-stereotypical, and actually much more realistic, way of life for gay couples. It shows that gay couples face the same problems as straight couples in building and maintaining relationships and in some respects such as acceptance and child adoption face a huge uphill struggle against prejudice and misconceptions. This book is great read and I thank David for inviting the reader to share his family's experiences.

I loved to hear about the trials and tribulations of the Valdes Greenwood family! The section about house hunting was especially entertaining!

What a terrific book. With refreshing candor, author David V.G. wryly and brilliantly charts the very human evolution of he and his partner's relationship, from meeting to dating to marriage to drifting apart to legal marriage to parenthood. Anyone of any orientation will be able to appreciate the joys and trials of love relationships so beautifully described in it's pages, though gay people will likely take special relish in the writing. Frequently laugh-out-loud funny, this heartfelt memoir is well worth acquainting yourself with. Having founded and facilitated a longtime urban gay fathers group, I found more than a lot to love and relate to and appreciate here. Bravo David!