Hero: Becoming the Man She Desires

I didn't know this, but "Hero" ends a trilogy of books written by Fred Stoeker in the "Every Man" series. These books are more than instruction in Godly living: Fred truly bares his life for examination and example in a way that not only demonstrates integrity and a desire to reach young men early in their lives, but that makes him one of my heroes. "Hero" examines the life of a young man who totally surrenders his life and his purity to God early in his life and how he succeeds, despite the odds of failure presented to him on every side. The young man is Jasen Stoeker--and his father couldn't be more proud of him. In spite of a family curse that involved sexual issues and pornography, Jasen took his father's early teaching of 'fleeing youthful lusts' to heart and patterned his life after some beloved Bible heroes. Fred makes the excellent case for American society's demise into the lust-filled environment we live in today, tracing it from the creation of Hugh Hefner's multi-billion dollar magazine to the vast array of internet pornography available at the click of the keyboard. But he doesn't let us off the hook...WE are responsible for how we respond, and as Jasen has demonstrated, a life properly aligned with Christ early on can make all the difference in the world. Drawing Old Testament parallels, this book is an eye-opening reading experience for this sheltered Christian mother! I know these things are out there, but never really focused on how they could affect MY SON even while he lives under my roof. Shame on me for taking such a critical topic so lightly, and I'm going to get him to read this book with his father. I want my son to be a hero to his future wife, and to his female friends right now. It's never too late! Get a copy of "Hero" and read it for yourself, educate your family, and use it in the men's studies at your churches and small groups. I'm giving "Hero" five out of five bookmarks, with an iron stake to drive into the ground, claiming back our youth for Christ.

Hero by Fred & Jasen Stoeker should be required reading for every Christian young man and his parents. Fred, author of Every Man's Battle, faced a battle against the flesh that had been passed down from grandfather to father to son, until one day looking into his two-year old son Jasen's eyes, he decided that the generational curse of adultery and pornography would end with him. Because of Fred's decision, Jasen made his own decision to keep himself pure until marrying the woman God led him to, which didn't exactly make him the most popular guy in high school. Despite temptation and peer pressure, Jasen didn't even kiss his wife Rose until the minister gave them permission during their wedding ceremony. The authors attack the strongholds of deceit that society has instilled in our brains about sex: women want it just as much as men, finding out if you are sexually compatible before marriage is necessary, God gave men a sexual desire so He of course allows them an outlet, and other lies. Jasen talks about his walk through high school and college, facing derision and coming out a strong man of God on the other side. His wife Rose also offers her point of view on what a true hero of God looks like. Their revelations about how society has warped even Christians' view of sex are startling and enlightening. It's a powerful book with a must-read message

I know that Hero is written to men, but it should give some hope and perspective to single women as well. Maybe to know how to treat and pray for their future husbands and the guys in their lives, but it should also give hope that there ARE men out there worth waiting for and not to settle for less than a "hero."

Hero, Becoming the Man She Desires, by Fred Stoeker and his son, Jasen, is a fabulous book for a teen, young adult, or parent. Essentially, it is a book about how a single, young man can remain (or become) sexually pure. In doing so, you strengthen your relationship with God through your obedience to His word, you protect the women who come into your life, and eventually you find a similar young woman with whom to spend the rest of your life. The principles of this book are not easy - a fact the authors admit - but they are possible and Jasen Stoeker proves it. His first kiss (EVER) occurred on his wedding day to a beautiful, righteous young woman. While his wife had kissed in the past, she, too, had remained sexually pure. I had the pleasure and honor of knowing a young couple such as this. A handsome young man and a beautiful young woman who saved themselves for each other on their wedding day. Although their decisions weren't easy and didn't always make them popular, they had/have plenty of friends and more fun than I ever thought possible. In fact, this book made me sad because although I'm happily married now, I didn't remain pure in my life and I was skeptical of anyone who would want to try. Now that I am older, wiser, and slightly more in tune with God's heart, I know He was right and I was wrong (duh). This is what God intended for a relationship. This book is down to earth and honest about the difficulty of the task. It also contains invaluable practical advice on how to win the battle. Although the intended audience of this book is young, single men, I think it would be great for parents (to talk to your kids), young women (to know what you should be looking for in a godly man and what their battle is like) and older, single men who may not be sexually pure, but can turn repent and change their ways to become pure from this point forward. This is truly an essential book if you have a pre-teen, teen or college age son.

I will start by making two disclaimers - 1) I am related to the authors and 2) I am a woman. I think these two things give me additional insight into this book. Whenever I read a book like this it is very important to me to know that the authors are living out what they write. I have known Fred and Jasen my whole life and I know that they are what they represent themselves to be in the book. Fred and Brenda's marriage is one that I hope to emulate someday when I get married. In this book Fred gives insight that is biblically sound and has been proven true in the crucible of life. I also had the opportunity to watch Jasen and Rose's relationship from the time Jasen was trying to decide whether to ask Rose out to their first kiss on their wedding day. Jasen and Rose sought to glorify God in their dating relationship and continue to do so in their marriage. Jasen really was and continues to be a Hero. I have two observations about this book from the female perspective. First, to all of the single men out there who are looking at this book - this is the kind of man that godly, single women are looking for. We are looking for men who will take a stand for purity. We are looking for men who zealously guard their own purity, but will also protect our purity and encourage us to go deeper in our walk with God. There are several stories in this book about men who decided to take a stand for purity and their girlfriends resented it. If you are in a relationship like that - get out. A godly woman will encourage you and pray for you as you pursue purity. Second, this book has several sections that are written by Rose. I really appreciated that because it illustrates what a godly woman looks like. Finally, it has been my experience that books like this are frequently read by women. If you are a single woman looking at this book I recommend you read it. It will show you what kind of a man you should be looking for. Don't settle for anything less than a Hero!