Hello, Lied the Agent: And Other Bullshit You Hear as a Hollywood TV Writer

Ian Gurvitz gets it. In 342 pages he beautifully encapsulates the angst, torment and general shpeilkis of TV development and turns the frustrating into something funny. It's a bucket of cold water in the face of those with dreams of being the next King of Television. Only, the title seems a bit "down" and could the book be brown instead of black? Oh and can the main character find true love at the end with sexy consequences? Lastly, Ian is a clammy name. How about Tad?

If you want to learn the inner workings of the TV- or for that matter, Hollywood- writing world, without the boredom of other 'so-called' experts, YOU MUST READ THIS BOOK! It is funny...no, HILARIOUS! From page one, Ian Gurvitz takes you on a wild and wonderful ride, and does not let up. HELLO, LIED THE AGENT is a must-read for anyone who wants to get into the business (and even of you don't, you'll find yourselves in stitches anyway).

This book could not be more cynical about the TV industry if it tried, but that is what makes it such a funny and honest depiction. It provides a great insight into the process and improbability of getting a TV show aired and, despite the hurdles Gurvitz describes, he has managed to create two, both of which were majorly successful--Becker and Wings. I listened to the audio and Gurvitz's East Coast, croaky drawl truly captures the sardonic wit in the his writing. I recommend this to everyone in the industry, even if it is to just read the secrets revealed about everyone else involved.

There are many books about the entertainment business but I'm not aware of any besides 'Hello, Lied The Agent' which manage to capture the often agonizing, occasionally ecstatic day to day life of a TV writer in the process of developing a new series... Gurvitz's book features quotable lines on just about every page ("It's been said that in Hollywood, friends don't want friends to fail; friends want friends to die") and a comprehensive overview of the television landscape valuable to anyone who's ever wanted to know how shows - brilliant or execrable - proceed from concept to airing (or more likely oblivion). Take it from someone who didn't write the book; it is a great read...

Forget for the moment that I wrote the book and that that statement might come off more than a little biased but wtf, I might as well be the first to review it. At least I know it'll be favorable. (And if anyone does end up giving it a negative review it's only because they're ignorant.) This is, with the exception of a few other books on the subject, easily the best book about being a Hollywood tv writer I've ever read. If you don't believe me, here are a few quotes from the back cover: "If you read only one book this year that took a lot of balls to write, this is the one. We live with war and pollution and corruption and pretend to care, but the thing that really affects our lives: network TV sucks. Finally, you'll know the reason why." BILL MAHER "Ian Gurvitz's "Hello," Lied the Agent is howlingly funny and sadistically truthful. In a Hollywood fraught with paranoia and fear, Gurvitz sticks a mirror in the reader's face while stabbing us in the gut with a butter knife--forcing us to appreciate the greatest industry in the world without having it killing us first." ANTHONY E. ZUIKER, CREATOR AND EXECUTIVE PRODUCER--CSI FRANCHISE "The life of a TV comedy writer in Hollywood is similar to that of our ancestors on the plains of Africa: brutal, short and without pity. There is something noble here." ED O'NEILL There are also some very complimentary and accurate quotes from Bernie Brillstein, Ted Danson, Dennis Miller, Robert Kaplow, Tom Arnold, and Larry King. I swear, I'm not making this up. Check it out for yourself.