Handfasted and Heartjoined

Not just ceremony but practical prep guide!!!

I was suprised after reading this book to find so many harsh and judgemental reviews! Having been married before, I found the authors voice to be extrememly refreshing. This book is not a "How To" book, by any means. I do not believe it was meant to be... On the contrary, I believe this book to be the ultimate resource for the development of realistic expectations. The author is definitely opinionated with regard to inter-faith marraiges, and her experience is primarily with that of coven-initiated pagans; so it is to be expected that she voice her opinions as such. However, I did not find her voice at all judgemental or discriminatory. Afterall, she made a point throughout the book to insist that, when done with intention and for the "right" reasons, ANY union can be successful. Deciding to get married is a huge decision, and unfortunately, the current divorce rates are proof that too many people embark on this decision without a clear or realistic vision of "why," or what to expect. It was her views on what it takes to have a successful union that drew me to her work. I found her to be brutally realistic, forcing the reader to really look within his or herself to determine the true intention behind their desire for union. Her views are based on years of intimate experience with couples and their paths to unity, and I found her stories of actual experiences to be extremely illuminating. I also found her realistic approach to planning, extremely helpful! When I married for the first time, I allowed my family and friends to make decisions for me and ultimately (although my wedding was beautiful), it was not about me and proved to be a miserable experience. This author has an unbelievable grasp of what works! Her views are opinionated, but with good reason. Sadly, I believe many of the reviews thus far, to be extremely unfair and most likely the rants of some extremely stressed out or insecure people. The fact is, she makes some incredibly good points, whether you choose to agree with them or not. When you pick up a book, on any subject, you do so because you are interested in what another being has to say. It is soley up to you to choose what to take from it. That in mind, this work is not for the faint of heart. If you don't have a clear idea of who you are and what you want, or you are expecting someone else to tell you exactly what you should do, step-by-step, then by all means avoid this book.

I found this book to be quite helpful and I agree with the reader from Rego Park, NY, that the criticisms are too harsh. In fact, I thought it was a lovely small book, easy to use, and very well written. Also, I did not find the author's comments about the Big White Dress to be snide. In fact, her comments seemed supportive to do it the way you want to even if you want to wear the BWD. After all, it's not what you wear that makes the ceremony, but what you feel inside and who you are.Lecachot from Austin, TX may have had some unrealistic expectations for a wedding, expecting a book to do all the work. I think the book is worth reading and I'm very glad I bought it before reading a review like Lecashot's.

I found Shonna Rhein's assessment of this book to be harsh and overly critical. This book contains all of the information that you need to know about being hand-fasted. It also has a lot of information about Pagan relationships in general. I would recommend this book to anyone that wants to know more about this subject.

I have been looking for a book on handfastings since I discovered the religion of wicca. I finally found one, and I was pretty impressed with the information and ideas given in it. The only problem is, becaus i have read so little ont eh subject, I have no idea how well researched this book is. But all in all it has excellent ideas and it shows that there are different degrees of handfastings. A simple handfasting, for example, can be as long or as short a commitment as two people want, whereas the more "serious" handfastings are "as long as the love shall last". Her opinions can help you form your own but remember, as she says, IT IS YOUR HANDFASTING, no one should be able to tell you what you can and cannot do in your own ritual of love.

This was the first and only book I could find on Handfasting. I had already started (and almost completed) the preparations for my own Handfasting when I ordered this book. Maeve Rhea starts off the book with a negative Handfasting experience as a warning (that's my guess) that this is a rite which should be seriously thought out. I agree with that viewpoint. Ms. Rhea also is of the opinion that pagans and non-pagans should not be Handfast. This is something that should be a matter of choice for those involved. This book has some useful information and is well written. I had finished reading it in a matter of hours. I recommend this book to those who are planning a Handfasting and are sure of themselves.