Growing Pains: Learning to Love My Father's Faith

I am weary of the multitude of books on church abuse and the authors who bemoan their evangelical upbringing. Though there is real abuse and there are real issues with those who are raised in evangelical homes, it is not as if being raised evangelical is the only upbringing which can bring with it potential baggage in adulthood. Randall Balmer, in his book Growing Pains,was refreshing in his commitment to simply reflect without self-pity the blessings and curses of growing up evangelical. This collection of deeply personal essays gives the reader the sense that he or she is sitting with Balmer just listening to him share his experiences and reflections. The essays are not really meant to form a cohesive argument about one topic (this is true especially in the latter half of the book)but are more just a collection of varied thoughts and reflections from the author. Some of the essays (like the one on Postcards) are funny and nostalgic while others (Sins of the Fathers) are heartbreaking. Well worth reading to look into the mind and heart of a child of the evangelical culture.

Randall Balmer emerged several years ago as a significant voice in the analysis of American evangelicalism with his book Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory, which became the basis for an acclaimed PBS mini-series documentary of the same name. Balmer's style there was that of a journeyman who recorded his observations--sometimes quizzical, often insightful, and occasionally profound. That casual-but-serious attitude toward the phenomena of religious belief carries over into this little volume, but the content here is purposely autobiographical. And like Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory, in Growing Pains Balmer uses vignettes rather than argumentation to make his points. Most of these are intensely personal, couched in the fabric of family life, church, faith and doubt. The catalyst for these reflections is Randy's relationship with his evangelical preacher father, whose recent death stirs around these powerful emotional images. We see a six-year-old boy smiling behind a toy pulpit that was his Christmas present, and hear him choke back tears when he can't play baseball good enough for his dad. We grow with him through the awkwardness of being an American teenager from a fundamentalist background, part of a sub-culture that feels more comfortable in the margins of society. We hear his questions and struggles with the faith while he pursues an ever-widening education, moving from small Midwestern towns to an evangelical seminary to Ivy League universities. He even lets us in on messy family squabbles, bittersweet memories of lost love, and the pain of wanting to be accepted but free at the same time. The narrative roams around here and there, but always an undercurrent of yearning brings back the main theme--how the simplistic form of the faith handed him by his father has been at the same time his life's primary source of both frustration and hope. By the end there is a sense of catharsis, and of moving forward in the faith with questions still in hand. There must be a whole host of adult children of fundamentalists and evangelicals who will find themselves deeply embedded in this kind of narrative. Growing Pains touches a nerve, albeit gently and carefully. Randy's honesty and familiarity penetrate to the heart and soul while respecting the mind, an often difficult combination. Perhaps Randy has found the pastoral calling he never quite heard, by simply telling his story to those of us who share his story. This kind of book can truly minister to countless evangelicals who want to honor their parents' faith in a new generation.