Emotional Vampires: Dealing with People Who Drain You Dry

This is a really good read. The concepts are clear and the author uses humor to share the characteristics of people who have certain emotionally draining traits. He is also kind in covering these traits-not judgmental and also points out some of the good.

I am one of those whose whole life has been sucked dry and made crazy by a pair of emotional vampires for decades. I have never been able to deal with them well at all until I read this book, no kidding. I have been to o so much therapy and that only helped a little. THIS is the manual I needed all this time. The analogies are perfect, they are NOT overdone. I'm glad they go all the way through the book because it helps me refer to what I need in a way my mind can understand when in that potentially dire state. The categories are amazingly insightful and helpful and instead of just stirring up anger at recognition of patterns like most books in this category, it told me effectively WHAT to do and what NOT to do about the situations they create. I just spent 6 days with this scary pair and feel relatively unscathed for the first time ever! And yes I learned to identify & hopefully erase the remnants of my own negative behaviors that I could not get my focus on before. If someone you can't avoid has been making you crazy, this investment, with diligent repeated reading, (you should see the number of dogeared pages in my copy already) might just give you the sanity you've been seeking. Thank you thank you thank you to the author.

I couldn't put this book down, it was so engaging. I just read it two times in a row. It tells you all about personality disorders in a very humorous, user-friendly way. I learned alot in a very short period of time - - about myself and the people I interact with. This is not "one size fits all" advice. He suggests different strokes for different folks. He also shows how there's a little vampire in each of us.

Gee, I work with two vampire personalities but I have to tell you that this book by Bernstein has to be, by far, the finest non-technical description of personality disorders that I've ever encountered. It's for both the layman and the psychologist and, best of all, it's self-help. I can't say enough about it. It reads like deja vu for anyone who has ever suffered the attentions of self-promoting, self-worshipping, narcissistic psychopaths. His advice is sound but they're so crazy you can't always use it--yet you will feel better after reading his work.

& #65279;Emotional Vampires teaches you how to protect yourself from people who emotionally and materially drain you for their own gain and at your expense. These "vampires" prey on colleagues, friends, and family. They are especially dangerous because their self-absorption prevents them from seeing that they are harming others, and even makes them think they are helping others. "Vampires" are especially gifted at finding the most vulnerable victims. With Dr. Bernstein's help, these vampires will see you as no easy prey and move on to others. You recognize Emotional Vampires by the emotional aftermath: they "take a lot out of you," they leave you feeling "drained," they "pushed your buttons," they are "high maintenance," etc. Dr. Bernstein is right on the money with "vampire bite" as a metaphorical diagnosis for the real harm these types cause, but beware: the fangs seldom show, and emotional vampires can seem as harmless and ineffectual as Aunt Bea, or as affable as Will Rogers. Each chapter is a recognizance of different "vampire" personality types. I realized I was particularly vulnerable to the "histrionics" who thrive on drama for its own sake. I used Bernstein's techniques on a certain "histrionic" vampire in my life, and now I'm thankfully out of her perpetual soap opera. I urge everybody to buy this book. It's a funny and easy read, but the subject is serious and the insights ring deeply true. Once you have read it you will have the power to protect yourself from a lot of hard times and wasted hours.