Dear Sister, Once Abused: A Story of Hope and Freedom from the Bondage of Childhood Sexual Abuse

Although my sister had died before I read Dear Sister, Once Abused, I gained necessary insight into her challenges with childhood sexual abuse. This was the best book I could have read on this subject for my situation. There were many similarities. This book has helped me and I will pass it on to others."

If Dear Sister, Once Abused, the first book written by psychiatric nurse Victoria Lynn, were a conventional first-person account of discovery and recovery from childhood sexual abuse (CSA), sympathetic readers would expect a higher than usual quotient of self-absorption and finger-pointing. They will be pleasantly surprised that Dear Sister's...deeply troubling story is coupled to specific information and techniques that other victims, their families and friends as well as clinicians, therapists and clergy may use to understand and deal effectively with the seemingly chronic after affects of childhood sexual abuse. Lynn also hopes that reading about the lasting damage they cause may even dissuade some perpetrators and provoke them to seek help. Lynn tells her story in conversational language that creates the distinct impression that she's invited you into her kitchen for a confidential "straight-from-the-soul" chat - tangents and all --over a cup of coffee. Her obviously cathartic report candidly bares many excruciating details-- confounding setbacks and exhilarating breakthroughs. Plagued all her life by serial physical and emotion maladies, Lynn's vivid "breakthrough" recollection at age 42 that she had been molested as a three-year-old sets of an obsessive quest that illustrates dramatically the life-long residual affects of childhood sexual abuse. The details of her struggle make a compelling case for early intervention and vigilance by parents, health care providers, teachers and clergy. "That's why I wanted to write the book in the first place - to help victims and people who can help victims," she says emphatically."Although I had the telltale symptoms, mother admits she did not know what to look for and none of the doctors she took me to ever suggested I might have abuse trauma," Lynn writes. She notes that key telltales are eating disorders: one expert claimed "that 90 percent (or more, in his opinion) of those suffering from an eating disorder have a history of sexual abuse," she writes. Understandably Lynn's search for "my truth, as I know it" upset those near and dear,, but, in the end, brought deeper understanding as to why relationships with her mother, father and step-father -- who took over parenting duties when Lynn was just seven-had been strained, frightening and contentious. When her paternal grandmother finally seems to confess that Lynn's recovered memory is accurate, but that the abuser was her recently deceased grandfather, not her father as Lynn had suspected, the grandmother adds dismissively - "you can't blame a dead man." In keeping with the way people of her generation often dealt with painful issues from the past, her grandmother chides: "Why can't you just forget about something that happened so long ago?" The confession - and subsequent loss of a close relationship with her grandmother-- propelled Lynn into another mental and physical tailspin, yet "It helped me to have my my own knowledge of what happ

As I read through the Pages of Dear Sister, Once Abused, I found myself finally understanding the reasons why my life was in such a turmoil. I understand what I have to do to heal. Now I have hope.

Victoria Lynn, psychiatric nurse, draws upon her experience and talks openly about her healing process from childhood sexual abuse. This book is a powerful resource for adults who have suffered abuse and for their families and friends. Well written and hopeful, it is about a journey that connects with human suffering and opens hearts to understanding.